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Ukraine Storm forecast over Cuba

In a new long range weather forecast designed to predict the spread of Neo-Imperialism from West to East, a severe new cell of potential Neo-Liberalism is being reported in the Caribbean, and is expected to make landfall on Cuba, so Batistering the Island Nation into a Neo-Liberal dream.

The Bateristing of this new Ukraine Storm is being fomented by US foreign Policy apparatchiks.

President Obama mentioned this new cell, caused by a secret gust of desire for the Oil off Cuba’s North West Coast; he averred that in such cases, the traditional American method of political weather forecasting, (simply denying there was any weather,) does not work.

The process is explained in this quote by President Obama:

After all, these 50 years have shown that isolation has not worked. It’s time for a new approach.

Nice idea. New approach to what objective, one asks?

Our new weather forecasting model, developed independently from our own tea leaves, expects a severe bout of Ukraineism to develop some months after the establishment of a new US embassy in Havana. We forecast that this new political weather shift may result in numerous severe political winds hitting Havana – winds that are designed to blow away the people that the Neo-Liberals have been unable to defeat for 50 years, using old approaches. US embassies are famous for generating big winds.
The Neo-Liberals want to turn Cuba from a Communist Paradise, where the Government has everything and the proletariat have nothing, (but they receive government support,) into a capitalist paradise where a cabal of neo-fascist “oily-garchs” have everything and the proletariat replace government support with debt.

We have no doubt that the relatively shallow waters off Cuba believed to have oil will provide massive riches for these new Spanish speaking oily-garchs. They have multiple local models of appalling US-backed governance to copy from, such as Honduras, Mexico, and El Salvador to name but a few, and many more examples in the rest of the world starting in Saudi Arabia and Running the gamut to Egypt, or the benevolent, open-minded government of Israel.

As for the people of Cuba, they too will come to enjoy the freedom of living under a neo-liberal regime, which provides the opportunity to work multiple jobs for little benefits, to pay off massive housing, education, credit card and medical debts. Life is so much better when you are free to pay your debts.

Such will be the new workers’ paradise for Cubans, brought to you be a US-inspired, CIA driven coup, centered on the new (old) US Embassy in Havana, and driven the return of Cubans from the US experienced in the way of neo-liberalism (Lead by Ted Cruz and Mario Rubio).

This brings us to an aphorism: Be careful what you wish for, you might get it.

Cubans may remember what caused the rise of Castro. America seems to have forgotten.

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