Thank Heaven Larry Summers Isn’t Fed Chair
Everyone, especially Barack Obama, just thinks Larry Summers is the smartest guy in the room, even if America’s Top Whiner Jamie Dimon is in the room. Maybe so. But his interpersonal skills are worse than Mike Huckabee talking about women. So it’s no surprise shortly after the news cyclists were telling us that 85 people have as much wealth as the poorest 3.5 billion humans on the planet, Larry gets on the boob tube’s silliest channel, CNBC, to explain that we mustn’t do anything about inequality that involves in any way reducing the wealth of the filthy rich.
We shouldn’t be jealous and envious of the obscenely rich, he claims; instead we should find the magic beans that will grow the economy. Larry you ignorant money slut. The economy has been growing for decades, but the stinking rich are taking all the growth for themselves. They aren’t creating jobs, they’re forcing workers to take less. Did you miss the Boeing destruction of a portion of the Seattle middle class? Did you miss Target firing a bunch of people because its IT department can’t handle basic data security? Did you miss the part where the gigantic slaughterhouse corporations want to speed up the lines and privatize meat inspection to increase profits at the expense of workers and meat-eaters? Did you notice the manipulations of Freedom Industries and the efforts of its owner to take the assets and run after poisoning Charleston WV? No, I guess those things don’t show up in your pointless DSGE models, do they?
Try inputting this factoid into your massive intellect, O Great One: The rich take all the money and leave nothing for anyone else. Once you have that fact firmly fixed in your quantum computer brain, then tell us how you plan to get them to stop.
We’d love to hear your plan for sweet-talking the thugs on Wall Street into ending their thievery through financial fraud, pension rip-offs, sleazy interest rate swaps, and all those other innovations you and your buddies at DE Shaw love so much. We’d love to hear about all the new jobs created by the tax avoidance activities of GE, Apple, Google, Starbucks and every other global enterprise. We’d love to hear how you plan to get corporate giants to quit funding ALEC, and quit buying slimy politicians to do their bidding at the expense of the rest of us.
We can’t wait to hear your plan for restoring bargaining power to workers when labor force participation rates have fallen to 35 year lows, and it isn’t retiring baby boomers, either. We’d love to hear how suddenly states will start paying for education as a social good instead of funneling money to test-driven corporate charter schools and sleazy on-line “universities”. We’d love to hear about your plans for waking up the Congress to take any action that might in any way help whatever’s left of the middle class or the hopes of the poor to escape poverty, when their primary goal is obviously to feed the rich with the scraps of the safety net that remain, and pacify their bases with their family values. Instead, I expect we’ll be hearing about your plan to keep corporate profits at ludicrous levels, so as not to hurt the stock prices of your hyper-rich friends.
Get a grip, Summers. You might be the smartest guy in the world, but that doesn’t mean you know anything about human nature. That’s the real reason you aren’t Fed Chair. We think you are an idiot. Maybe an idiot savant, but an idiot.
Photo by E.T. Studhalter World Economic Forum, used under Creative Commons license