Seeing as how our own local mayor is having his own grabby-kissy-headlocky-you-work-better-without-panties problems with the ladies which has brought The Pox of Allred upon our fair city (the only way to stop Gloria Allred from getting to a microphone is to put an actual courtroom between her and a podium) I have been loath to point out that NYC’s Anthony Weiner seems to lack the good judgment and the ability to make common sense decisions that one would come to expect from a Big City Mayor.
There, I said it. No going back now.
But here, this is Evil Anti-Progressive Kabuki-Orchestrating 1%-Enabling Nancy “Evil Anti-Progressive Kabuki-Orchestrating 1%-Enabling” Pelosi taking two bad tastes and rolling them up into one really bad taste:
House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi tore into Anthony Weiner and San Diego Mayor Bob Filner, saying Thursday the two former House Democrats should “get a clue” as they face backlash for their questionable behavior with women.
“Let me be very clear, the conduct of some of these people that we’re talking about here is reprehensible,” Pelosi said at her weekly press conference on Capitol Hill.
Her comments came after Rep. Jerry Nadler, a fellow Democrat who represents part of Manhattan, made biting comments about Weiner, saying Wednesday night that the New York City mayoral hopeful “needs serious psychiatric help.”
Weiner admitted this week that he continued sending racy messages more than a year after the same habit forced his 2011 resignation from Congress.
Meanwhile, on the West Coast, a third woman came forward Tuesday accusing Filner, who served in Congress for two decades, of sexual harassment.
Here is some simple advice…
For Bob Filner: you are a seventy year-old man and not particularly attractive, and by that I mean: not in the least. I’ve met you in person several times so I know this to be a fact. And while it is said that power is an aphrodisiac, there isn’t enough combined power in the known world (solar, nuclear, gas-fired, wind, coal, wood chips, the smouldering gaze of George Clooney) to make women secretly wish that you would grab them in a headlock and thrust your tongue down past their uvula. I know, weird, hunh? So, stop it. Resign. Buy a fleshlight, it never wears panties. Unless you want it to.
For Anthony Weiner: Nobody wants to see your dick. Nobody. Ever. Not even on Grindr. Stop humiliating your wife, unless she wants to be humiliated … I don’t judge. If you must share peen with the world, please drop out of the race and devote yourself to occasional show-and-tells on the subway where such behavior is considered quaint, but been-there-seen-that. And if you must share schlong pictures via the intertubes, please restrict them to emails to Bob Filner’s fleshlight at firstname.lastname@example.org.
I’m sure it will be suitably impressed…