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Creepy Twins Will Own Your Ass With Their Fantasy Internet Nerd Money

Obnoxious twin uber-yuppie bros, Winklevii 1 & Winklevii 2, are going all in (just like Chris Hayes!) on the latest get-rich-quick scam financial opportunity since tens of thousands of men quit their cubicle-monkey jobs to stay home and be “day traders”, where they sucked all of the equity out their homes to invest in such can’t-miss financial homeruns like buystringonline.com or ludditewarehouse.com. Of course now all of those day trader guys are divorced and living in efficiency apartments and hanging out all-night online at the mens-rights Reddit because “..bitch wouldn’t let me follow my dreams. Took the kids. Fuck her“.

But what of the Winklevii?

The 31-year old identical twins have amassed since last summer what appears to be one of the single largest portfolios of the online currency that has caused such a stir in financial and technology circles.

An array of speculators have now bid up the price of the bitcoin to the point where the outstanding supply of the digital money was worth $1.3 billion at last count. The Winklevii — as they are popularly known — say they own nearly 1 percent of that, or some $11 million.

The decision by the brothers to go public with their position signals a new stage for what has been an experimental alternative to national currencies. Created in 2009 by a programmer or programmers known only by a pseudonym, the bitcoin world has been dominated by anonymous programmers and traders.

Now mainstream investments in the digital money are starting to emerge. On Thursday, a group of venture capitalists, including Andreessen Horowitz, announced that they were funding a bitcoin-related company, OpenCoin.

Tell me more about this speculative financial instrument which has intrigued these job creators and will surely not end in ruined lives, lost nest-eggs and (another) financial Armageddon:

But then there is the issue of bitcoin value fluctuation:

TBogg

Creepy Twins Will Own Your Ass With Their Fantasy Internet Nerd Money

Obnoxious twin uber-yuppie bros, Winklevii 1 & Winklevii 2, are going all in (just like Chris Hayes!) on the latest get-rich-quick scam financial opportunity since tens of thousands of men quit their cubicle-monkey jobs to stay home and be “day traders”, where they sucked all of the equity out their homes to invest in such can’t-miss financial homeruns like buystringonline.com or ludditewarehouse.com. Of course now all of those day trader guys are divorced and living in efficiency apartments and hanging out all-night online at the mens-rights Reddit because “..bitch wouldn’t let me follow my dreams. Took the kids. Fuck her“.

But what of the Winklevii?

The 31-year old identical twins have amassed since last summer what appears to be one of the single largest portfolios of the online currency that has caused such a stir in financial and technology circles.

An array of speculators have now bid up the price of the bitcoin to the point where the outstanding supply of the digital money was worth $1.3 billion at last count. The Winklevii — as they are popularly known — say they own nearly 1 percent of that, or some $11 million.

The decision by the brothers to go public with their position signals a new stage for what has been an experimental alternative to national currencies. Created in 2009 by a programmer or programmers known only by a pseudonym, the bitcoin world has been dominated by anonymous programmers and traders.

Now mainstream investments in the digital money are starting to emerge. On Thursday, a group of venture capitalists, including Andreessen Horowitz, announced that they were funding a bitcoin-related company, OpenCoin.

Tell me more about this speculative financial instrument which has intrigued these job creators and will surely not end in ruined lives, lost nest-eggs  and (another) financial Armageddon:

For those whose idea of money still involves greenbacks and metal coins, bitcoins do not exist in any explicit physical form. The creators wrote algorithms that allow only a finite number of bitcoins to be created — the count is currently around 11 million — with new coins “mined” by programmers who solve mathematical riddles.
The coins can then be bought and sold through upstart exchanges, and held in what are known as virtual wallets.

Which means that new bitcoins can be created by finding them like easter eggs in a video game or solving complicated puzzles like finishing Myst, which is a perfectly sound basis for a worldwide monetary system. If you are fourteen. But, if it works out, gay math wizard Nate Silver is  going to be the new George Soros.

But then there is the issue of bitcoin value fluctuation:

The perils have been obvious over the last two days, as bitcoin has gone through its most volatile stretch ever, sinking from a high of $260 a bitcoin to a low of $105, before ending Wednesday around $175. On Thursday it was down again to $120 when one of the major online exchanges called a 12-hour halt on trading. The volatility has raised questions about whether bitcoin can even be called a currency.

So, say you are paying for your vente triple-mocha double-shot fat free coconut sprinkle soy latte and it comes to $9.40 ($11.35 in New York),  you can just offer to pay for it from your ‘virtual wallet’, because right now [checking Blackberry] one of your bitcoins is worth $170, oh wait…$131 …nope nope $71.50. Wow, wait… wait… okay, $111 now, so you can get that $7 scone you were eyeing in the bakery case because you’re rolling in the deep bitcoin cash now, sparky. At least for the moment.

But back to the Winklevii:

But the 6-foot-5 Winklevii were unfazed by the latest tumult. Indeed, the brothers said they used the low prices to buy more. They argue that bitcoin will have much further to soar once a broader audience sees its virtues: a unit of exchange that can be moved around the world at the click of a button without requiring any payments to Western Union or American Express.

“People say it’s a Ponzi scheme, it’s a bubble,” said Cameron Winklevoss. “People really don’t want to take it seriously. At some point that narrative will shift to ‘virtual currencies are here to stay.’ We’re in the early days.”

You should listen to these guys because they got fucked over by Mark Zuckerberg, so they totally know what they are doing….

 

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TBogg

TBogg

Yeah. Like I would tell you....