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Why they really hated Hugo Chavez

I see a bunch of right-wingers -and a few veal pen “pwogwessives” (as the late Alexander Cockburn dubbed them)- gloating over Chavez’s death. It’s easy to see why:

Chavez didn’t invade other countries. This alone made him Not Serious.

When dozens of countries volunteered to help Bush’s henchmen kidnap, torture and “disappear” turr-ists, Chavez not only refused but led the effort to convince other Latin American countries not to cooperate with the Cornpone Torquemada and his thugs. Very Serious leaders should always be at the beck and call of the White House -or at least, the CIA.
In 2004 Chavez stopped sending Venezuelan officers to Fort Benning for “training”, so they could no longer be taught the fine arts of torture, murder and overthrowing lawfully elected governments. Worse still, he encouraged other countries to do likewise. This is very Un-Serious: Where else can military officers learn to rape and kill nuns, then force local peasants at gunpoint to dump the bodies in a shallow grave?

Chavez didn’t assassinate people for writing nasty things on the internet, nor did he have someone’s 16-year-old son killed. Worse yet, he never used “double-tap” attacks designed by Very Very Serious People to kill first responders because if there’s anything more vile and Un-Serious than being the 16-year-old son of a man who writes mean things on a website, it’s someone trying to give first aid to the mortally wounded 16-year-old son of a guy who writes mean things on a website.

If only Chavez had waged illegal wars, tortured, raped, kidnapped and murdered whomever Washington wanted, when Washington wanted…

The Village would have loved him.

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