You know you’re a douchebag when Michelle Malkin thinks you’re a douchebag. Today’s douchebag is douche recidivist – apologies to douchebags for comparing her to a feminine hygiene appliance – Ann Coulter who described Barack Obama as a, “retard” in a mid-debate tweet Monday. “I highly approve of Romney’s decision to be kind and gentle to the retard,” she said.

“What a stupid, shallow thing to say, Ann,” said Malkin, who is a bit of a douchebag herself sometimes.

There are two things unique about this picture. First, Coulter chose the words, “kind and gentle”, two words missing from her lexicon until now. She usually chooses something like, “communist imbecile”. Still, that’s better than Rush Limbaugh who would’ve used, “communist imbecile manslut”.

Second, Malkin – who sometimes uses similar words – seemed genuinely offended. She must be going all liberal and shit because her complaint put her in league with a gaggle of socialist Hollywood fellow travelers like, Michelle Branch, Marlee Matlin, and Christina Applegate.

The R-Word

All the tweets specifically addressing the offending word used, “the R word” in place of “retard”. It evokes the “N word” debate. Not saying the word is probably worse than saying it during a discussion about it. These words are offensive, but people with brains functioning better than a marshmallow wouldn’t use them. But once you cross the line, better the ignorance of the user is on display for everyone to ridicule…and ridiculing Coulter is like ridiculing belly up fish in a barrel.

Of course Deadfish McCoulter doubled down, “The only people who will be offended are too retarded to understand it,” was her first response. In true Conservo-Coultarian fashion, she ducked any responsibility later when that excuse didn’t fly. “Obama: Stage 3 Romneya – because cancer references are HILLARIOUS. If he’s the smartest guy in the room it must be one retarded room.” That response – if you’ll excuse me for using the R-word just this once – isn’t even “retarded” it’s incompetent.

Ann, Stage 3 Romnesia is an AMNESIA reference, not a cancer reference and I’m fairly sure there is no amnesia lobby complaining about offenses involving “the A-word”. Though I sometimes wonder if Romney doesn’t have some sort of huge goobulent tumor, Obama was implying he forgets things easily when it suits him.

And, “the smartest guy(s) in the room” were Enron execs, which makes Obama sound like a very smart man indeed when compared with that lot of thieves and scoundrels –at least a lot smarter than someone who accidentally turns a perceived minus into a positive.

However, it isn’t for me to decide whether “the R-word” is offensive. I have no skin in the game other than taking great delight in reminding the world what a turd Coulter is – apologies for offending all you turds out there. But, Special Olympian and Down syndrome sufferer John Franklin Stephens can make the interpretation.

Well Played Franklin, Well Played

In one of the most eloquent letters I’ve ever read – written by an intellectually disabled person or not – Stephens makes his own point from the moral high ground. Ground where he stands head and shoulders above Coulter…or me. The letter is well thought out, sincere – and perhaps surprisingly – very magnanimous.

After pointing out all the misconceptions in Coulter’s comments, Franklin’s letter offers a touching olive branch.

“After I saw your tweet, I realized you just wanted to belittle the President by linking him to people like me. You assumed that people would understand and accept that being linked to someone like me is an insult and you assumed you could get away with it and still appear on TV. Well, Ms. Coulter, you, and society, need to learn that being compared to people like me should be considered a badge of honor.”

“Come join us someday at Special Olympics. See if you can walk away with your heart unchanged. [Signed] A friend you haven’t met yet.”

Well-played Franklin, well-played.

Cross posted at The Omnipotent Poobah Speaks! More than politics, more than pop culture & humor.

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