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The Troll Wars 69 – The Gay Love Chronicles of Hypocritical Republicans

Its been more than a week now since rumours of the gay love affair between Karl Rove and conservative boy wunderkind Ali A. Akbar surfaced on the internets. Bracing for a round of vigouorous denials from the straight arrow camp, we have instead been treated to the sounds of right-leaning crickets chirping…all the while a nice elderly gentleman named Grouch cranks up the rhetorical heat on a near daily basis. You go, grandpa.

Akbar, a convicted felon (nothing wrong with that), is a Cinderella Story. The kid from nowhere, who managed to pull himself up by his bootstraps. Or something.

He is the President of the National Bloggers Club, a supposed 501 (c) (3) non-profit charitable organisation that supposedly helps defend conservative bloggers against scurrilous attacks from the left. Y’know, from the likes of (follow the gold coin and repeat slowly after me) “Kimberlin, Rauhauser, Brynaert.”

Since the amping of the Troll Wars into the mainstream media in late May, Akbar has sought to insert himself and his organisation, which, yes Virginia, is indeed run from his mother’s house, into the mix of self-aggrandising self-promotional hoohaw emanating from certain precincts of the Rightwing (AKA Team Breitbart) in this ongoing alternative reality game known by many as the Kimberlin Kerfluffle. (SEE Troll Wars, Parts 1 thru 8.0 for further details)

At press time, we were unable to either confirm or deny whether Akbar’s mom has a basement, but we do ardently hope so, simply for the poetical symmetry if nothing else.

The political stakes are high. In case you are unaware, there is a Presidential Campaign going on and Rover is, as usual, at the center of a partisan controversy. His Crossroads GPS is raising gobs of money (naturally) with the intention of “educating” the voting public into casting our ballot for one of the non-Kenyans in the race.

Recently, Rove had a meltdown on Fox News, apparently alleging a string of mistruths about one Dana Simpson, a GOP whistleblower who has been at odds with certain stealth Log Cabin Republicans for quite some time.

Simpson responded in kind, demonstrating a marvelous backhand in the process of slapping Rover’s heinie so loudly that the whiteysphere sat up from its stupour and began to take notice.

It is believed by many of us that Karl thought we were going to use this for the benefit of President Obama, which was never the case. We do not care if [Rove] is bisexual or not and have many times ignored information that was given to us that suggested that he is. In fact, we find nothing wrong with being bisexual, as it means people just love both sexes at the same time. All of us are LBGTQ supporters, so we elected to not out this information on him. However, I think this is why he went berserk on national TV on Fox Network and said that I am a liar and have disappeared. He also lied when he said I had never testified under oath, as I have. It is Mr. Rove who insisted on executive privilege so as to not have to testify under oath about the Siegelman case.

This is a developing story that all progressives should get behind, even if we do not wish to insert ourselves in the end.

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