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Poor 50 Cent: Marriage Equality OK, but He’s Worried About His Buns Getting Grabbed

SLBPA inspiring member. (photo: Mikhail Teguh Pribadi/flickr)

Who knew that the first thing gay folks — specifically gay men in rapper 50 Cent‘s case — are going to do when society finally grants full civil equality to them is to engage in grab@ssery? He doesn’t care one way or another about whether gays and lesbians can marry; it’s all about his personal security when going in the elevator. He needs protection:

So in process, we need organizations for straight men. We do. We need organizations for straight men in the case you’ve been on the elevator and somebody decides they want to grab your little buns. Times are changing. Those organizations are set up for at one point they were being attacked for those choices. Now its completely different. Obviously [homosexuality] is more socially accepted.

Apparently all that’s holding the LGBT community back from sexually assaulting straight people is institutionalized homophobia. Alyssa Rosenberg at Think Progress:

One of the hardest things about getting people to surrender their privilege is helping them to understand that giving some of it up isn’t going to materially change their living conditions. Asking that women be treated equally isn’t to ask that women have the right to sexually harass men or to invert the pay gap so women make more than men. Advocating for gay rights is in part about communicating that 50 Cent’s arrogant fear that gay men want to grab his ass is unfounded. Liberation, done right, can make things better for both people who have privilege and people who don’t. The people who are disadvantaged get access to the rights they see denied them. And then people who have privilege end up freed from their fears of what might happen if things change, benefitting from their contact with people they were previously separated from.

I had to read that quote 3 times, and each time I laughed out loud at how simple-minded and self-focused it is.

Sadly, I don’t think that reasoned approach is going to help Fiddy out here. He obviously has such a high opinion of his booty that he thinks all gay men are lusting after it. This is reminiscent of the DADT hysteria that all of a sudden, if the discriminatory measure was repealed, that there would be gang rapes occurring in military showers. Why do some of these insecure straight guys think every gay man is scoping them out? Could it be projection about the way they treat and think about women as sexual objects…hmmmm?

A commenter on Facebook suggested a group to form to help 50 Cent out:

SLBPA: Straight Little Bun Protection Association. Mission statement: Keeping elevators safe from lil ass grabbers. Members: 50Cent.

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding