Most Likely To ...

Thank the goddess for Politico. It’s only been a day or so since the out of control freshman class of the GOP House completely humiliated its leadership, embarrassed the Republican Party (never mind the country) and caused even right wing pundits including the editorial board of the Wall Street Journal to bury their heads in shame and disgust. So what the country needed was a Politico article resurrecting the reputations of the leading GOP members of the most unpopular Congress ever.

How can we possibly thank Politico’s Marin Cogan enough for compiling a list of the “most likely to . . . ” House members, with an overwhelming focus on the up and coming GOP frosh? Mind you, this is the crew that managed to push Congress’ approval numbers to record lows, tried to force a default on the US debt, and used blackmail threats of shutting down the government three times this year to extract measures that weakened the government’s ability to function in a time of national economic crisis. Who needs terrorist enemies with patriots like these?

But apparently, news of this has not reached some at Politico. What we get is Politico’s choices for “most likely to succeed” (imagine the horror! the horror!), along with the “biggest jock,” the “most likeable,” the most over- and under-rated, and my personal favorite, the “most likely to lead a rebellion of the nerds,” who turns out to be a crackpot who worships some of the most wrong-headed economists of the last century or so.

How did America come to be so blessed?

In the holiday spirit, I offer the following to extend Politico’s list of the “most likely to . . .” I suggest they search the Congressional records and media for confirmation and then award the entire GOP frosh class — if not the entire GOP House — some additional awards:

Most likely to obstruct needed funding of essential programs,
Most likely to be in denial on global climate change
Most likely to badger federal regulators for doing their jobs
Most likely to cause thousands of deaths and illness by blocking EPA from protecting public health
Most likely to punish the unemployed, homeless, those in poverty, to teach them a lesson
Most likely to prevent universal access to health care
Most likely to exacerbate income inequality
Most likely to destroy equal rights for women and humans they see as different
Most likely to carry water for big oil, coal, gas, big banks, big insurance cos.
Most likely to get their “facts” from Fox News and thus to be dumber than average
Most likely to be alarmed by the Kenyan socialist in the White House
Most likely to support restriction of voter rights for those who disagree with them
Most likely to be ignorant on economics and oppose measures to help recovery
Most likely to lie about all of the above.

Feel free to add other “most likely” categories; Politico needs all the help they can get.

[photo: discpicture/Shutterstock.com]