Hey Dumas, just because …

Well Dumas has once again shown a superior wit and intellect (not to mention a knack for finding kick-ass shite in the “tubes and pipes”).

I mean how do you top that?

And I just read TBogg’s Also, Too, Bless Her Heart. (Can our retinas heal after being burned to a cinder?  I mean come on lady, I know you got money, but take a break from the plastic surgery.  The expression is, Shake what your momma gave you, not what your plastic surgeon gave you.)

I mean when I see this picture –

I can’t help but think of an “appropriate” caption.

How’s about –

1. Holy shite, I married this douche?  (Well ya.  He left his second wife for you.  Which is kinda funny and ironic since he did the same to his first wife.  And she had cancer.  It’s called family values.  Loot it up chica.)

2. Bloody hell, how long before I’m the next ex-Mrs. Gingrich? (Sweetheart, do you really need to ask?)

3. Damn benzos are wearing off, … Where are my pills?  (I’m guessing your other Gucci bag.  No worries, get your maid to find it.  Don’t want the maid slacking do you?  Your husband sure don’t: “Really poor children, in really poor neighborhoods have no habits of working and have nobody around them who works so they literally have – they have no habit of showing up on Monday. They have no habit of staying all day, they have no habit of ‘I do this and you give me cash’ unless it is illegal.”)

4. “buttplugistootight” (Nice who ever came up with this.)

I could go on …

But ya that’s just mean.  … But I will get over it.  … Somehow.  … I’m a very bad man.  Hope there’s Tequilla or Jager down under (no, not Australia).

And there’s more on the intertubes:

Family Values – Capitalism style?  ‘Face it, you’ve changed. The man I married would never subject his family to an annual cost-benefit analysis.’
Baldwin, Mike

Gingrich Family Values?

Family Values, kinda

Disney knows all about Family Values … Happiest place on earth?  You bet HER sweet …

Religion, … the other white meat?

Newt’s new motto. And why his current wife always looks like she does?

More family values?  Thank you sir, may I have another?  Wife? Well it’s not 40 virgins, … but oh well.

Capitalist Jesus is armed to the teeth and loves him some tax cuts.

“Sometimes I even disgust myself”

“It means never having to wait till your wife leaves the cancer ward before serving her with divorce papers.”


So who’s the next top model … I mean next R candidate in the lead?

I wouldn’t be surprised if Wasilla Barbie joined the fray.  (Ya, I know it’s too late and she would have to register/run as an independent if she decided to enter.  But does it matter?  “Palin, like any astute predator, smells blood in the water in Iowa.  “It’s not too late for folks to jump in,” Palin said during an interview on the Fox Business Network, according to advance excerpts. “Who knows what will happen in the future.”” Ya, a predator with a helicopter and a high-powered rifle.)

Perry coming back up?  I still say Perry/Bachmann.  Can’t keep the bat-shite crazy down.  Trust me they’ve tried.  Not enough meds in the world.  Not enough horse tranquilizer in the world.  Let’s get ready to (read: let’s continue to) say bat-shite crazy things on a national/international scale.  Because the rest of the world isn’t scared of us enough yet?

Disclaimer so they don’t NDAA my azz: I love Osterity.  Always have.  He’s so warm and cuddly.  And he took of his shirt.  And Michelle has such nice arms.  And his kids are awesome.  So awesome.  But those darn Rs keep obstructing him.  He’s just the prez, not a dictator.  It’s Congress’ fault.  … Oh wait, maybe it’s not their fault.  Can I get NDAAed for criticizing Congress?  If so, I love Congress.  I love them so much.  I want to hug them.  And squeeze them.  And bathe them in my sweet love.  And give them a pony/unicorn for the stellar work they are doing.  You guys (and girls) totally rock.  The casbah even.  So ya, I love everyone.  … Wait, is that socialism?  Shite!  Can I get NDAAed for that?  Bloody hell.  Fine, I like some people.  Can I please get the official list of the FBI/CIA/Homeland Security of the people I can like and those I can hate.  Would rally cut down on these disclaimers.

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