Didn’t You Used To Be Somebody?
We have chronicled the slow sad decline of grandmotherly Sarah Palin who was recently seen on the clearance racks at Wal-Mart. But she is not going to go away quietly and will rage rage against the coming endless Arctic night thanks to her BFF Greta Van Susteren (who loves to hang around with Sarah because she is so pretty and has lips). Unfortunately for Sarah, her star no longer shines so brightly and when she weighs in on The Matters Of The Day, well, she has to take a number and wait in line to be heard.
Yes. Sarah Palin is now getting second billing behind Dog the Bounty Hunter’s wife (Mrs. Dog? Mrs. B-Hunter? Puppybuttikins?). How the flighty have fallen.
Soon it’ll be a guest appearance on QVC, then maybe a Big Lot’s opening in Dayton. Then comes karaoke night at Bennigan’s where she will get in flight after failing to relinquish the microphone after the fourth boozy sobbing version of Total Eclipse of The Heart. But for now she is still serving up the Mama Grizzly Red Meat, and what is red meat without a side order of word salad:
“Hang him from the highest tree, and I’ll bring the rope if he is guilty of what has been alleged. If he abused these young children and ruined their lives unless they get a lot of help, Greta, in order to deal with the victimization that they are now suffering from, he needs to be punished to the fullest extent of the law if he is truly guilty.”
Word to your grandmother.