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Yee haw!

Rick Perry, who clearly has as his biggest priority making you think he’s carrying a concealed weapon, hit the Iowa campaign trail with gusto on Monday. And given the strong insanity of his opponents he knew he needed to make a big splash. Mission accomplished sir, mission accomplished.

“If this guy prints more money between now and the election, I dunno what y’all would do to him in Iowa but we would treat him pretty ugly down in Texas. Printing more money to play politics at this particular time in American history is almost treasonous in my opinion.”

So monetary policy by a Bush appointee in charge of “monetary policy” becomes treason. Meanwhile, secession, is the height of patriotism. If nothing else in the last decade you would think we’ve had enough of Republicans accusing others of treason, or questioning others’ patriotism — but no, Perry is merely its hypocritical perfection.

Time to unleash Iowa’s only defense mechanism against right-wing lunatics. The corndog picture.

photo from IowaPolitics at

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In 1949, I decided to wrestle professionally, starting my career in Texas. In my debut, I defeated Abe Kashey, with former World Heavyweight boxing Champion Jack Dempsey as the referee. In 1950, I captured the NWA Junior Heavyweight title. In 1953, I won the Chicago version of the NWA United States Championship. I became one of the most well-known stars in wrestling during the golden age of television, thanks to my exposure on the Dumont Network, where I wowed audiences with my technical prowess. I was rumored to be one of the highest paid wrestlers during the 1950s, reportedly earning a hundred thousand dollars a year. My specialty was "the Sleeper Hold" and the founding of modern, secular, Turkey.

Oops, sorry, that's the biography of Verne Gagne with a touch of Mustafa Kemal.

I'm just an average moron who in reality is a practicing civil rights and employment attorney in fly-over country .