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There’s a Hole in Daddy’s Head Where All the Money Goes

via S,N

If there is one thing to admire about the Tea Partiers, it is their total lack of self-awareness and embarrassment that allows them to glide through life on a wing and a prayer and a government disability check. To understand the BachmannPerry wing of the conservative movement that has an appalling, to say nothing of undeserved, amount of sway in our daily affairs, you need look no further than Stephen Stone who is the President of RenewAmerica in much the same way that I am the Publisher/CEO/Editorial Page Editor/Copy boy/Office stud of TBogg Really Really Big Media Empire, LLC.

Stephen had a medical problem, you see:

By nature, I’m not inclined to seek medical intervention, and prefer to rely on God — in faith — for His guidance and sustenance. At the time I was hospitalized, in fact, I hadn’t seen the inside of a hospital in over forty years, except to visit relatives or witness the birth of the first three of our eight children (the rest of whom were born at home with the help of midwives).

I feel it’s my duty to take charge of my own “health, education, and welfare,” and that of my family, through depending on God, not on human authority, and certainly not on government. As an example, my wife and I have home-schooled all our children end to end — teaching them to be God-centered and properly self-reliant — and as a result of this family togetherness and mutual learning, we’ve all been actively involved in the political arena for many years.

We’re also nearly done building a home by ourselves on our small farm — after years of work and sacrifice — so we might be reasonably independent and free of debt.

So when my duodenum burst, I put my trust in God, and He has blessed me and my family with His merciful care.


His intervention has included sending wonderful friends and supporters of RenewAmerica to our aid. He also matched me up with a wonderful surgical staff, whose expertise (and personalized care) has been a real blessing. So far, I’m progressing on schedule, and have experienced no apparent setbacks. I’ve been told it may take months to regain my full strength or get back to my normal work schedule, but things look good. 

Thankfully, I was otherwise in excellent health when my duodenum gave out, the doctor said — or I might have had more difficulty handling the surgery, or going days without food as my digestive system mended — and for this, I’m deeply grateful to divine Providence.

As far as our medical costs are concerned, the donations we’ve received have been just enough to cover the bills we’ve received to date (surgeon, anesthesiologist, emergency room, radiologist, pathologist, etc.). We haven’t yet received a formal bill from the hospital — only oral assurances — and we expect the actual bill to be substantial, but at least we’ve been able to keep up with all the other medical expenses.

So Stephen is a not-working, non-insurance-having, God-bothering, avidly-procreating, home-schooling, “self-reliant” patriotic American who, when confronted with a major medical issue, resorted to the time-tested common sense conservative principals espoused by our Founding Fathers: praying and begging.

Oh, and I left out the punchline:

We’re hoping to negotiate a minimum settlement with the hospital once its bill arrives.

As you can see from this humble and touching confession of vulnerability, when you dig deep down, Tea Partiers aren’t terrorists.

They’re children.

Really really stupid children.

Bless their pointed empty little heads…

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....