As a child, I longed to be female and become a female adult…

 

But first, I had to begin and END adolescence. As an adult, I still longed to be female. But first I had to begin and END “gender transition“. Today, I am neither transgender nor transsexual. I am female. The restroom I use shows “F”, not “M” or “T”…likewise the clothes I wear. I didn't need to look between my legs then or now. I AM female..my license and doctor tell me so. My journey, wherever it leads me, will never be part of lateral warfare that so many of you have decided to engage in.

 

Phobia reaches everywhere…even here in our online communities.

 

Many seek our demise..to force us into hasty retreat. They will stop at nothing from keeping “men” out of the Ladies room, although of course many of us utilize them now. Maybe I'm brighter…maybe I'm “dumber”…but this TG vs TS warfare is symptomatic of acute phobia…for me it is “incited” self-annihilation..and obviously so. It threatens to “put the toothpaste back into the tube”. Don't believe me…look at what has happened…destructive conflict. Many have fallen for this diversion from our focus…attainment of civil equal rights for EVERYONE promised by our founding fathers….this is and will remain our struggle.

 

Many disenfranchised groups have faced our struggle—and achieved equality—finally.

 

Our founding fathers promised equality for all. History is replete with examples of civil right struggles, past and ongoing—proof that this promise has yet to be fulfilled. Gender is but one of many characteristics of any person. The errancy of gender assignment at birth whether physical or not, such incongruency of which is made clear to most of us during our childhood, has never been more apparent. And yet it has become the sole reason for exclusion not inclusion in all aspects of our lives, whether as adult or child transitioners. This struggle for equality—merely for our place at the “starting line” is the result of imposed obstacles—that never should have been.

 

My outcry for civility is not for personal gain…often the cause and epitome of “evil“. 

 

I am the voice for the transgender children who have no voice—a voice from the graves of our fallen “gender non-conforming” sisters and brothers—a voice of our founding fathers beseeching us to achieve their promise of equality for all…and a voice for our fallen military heroes and for those who will inevitably fall in combat to make the U.S.A. an example that we can be a safe haven for ALL of our citizens, personal characteristics notwithstanding. This is what it means to be an American. Many of my fellow Air Force combat policemen, of which I was one for six years, have also fallen since Korea, Vietnam, and in our war against terror—a war that is truly without end due to its ubiquitous and asymmetrical nature. Indeed many, as myself, served and are serving in the military hoping that it will “masculinize” us to fulfill external expectations, only to discover that it is not in the gender business–it is in the “toughening-up” business—for all genders. Indeed, it was after two years in, barely post-teen, that my gender incongruity was confirmed—years before I even knew there was a diagnosis or remedy. Indeed it was this pivotal moment that reaffirmed my childhood gender incongruity—and propelled me to reach a positve decision to transition.

 

My life was spared, but my investment of two teen years

 

and four more for my country certainly entitles me to more than “thanks for your service”. Did I or didn't I, by stepping up to the line and volunteering to risk it all not just for self but country, “earn” the right to be the physical gender that I've always known I've been—since childhood? Certainly not! I haven't earned anything until EVERYONE has also achieved this right—otherwise it wouldn't truly be sacrifice. But it leaves no excuse for anyone to impede me from my “pursuit of happiness”—certainly their right to do so was earned in part by my service. After service to my country, I also gave of myself to my state and to my county—and yet such service will have been in vain if it was merely self-serving.

haviomally

haviomally