This is a Pam’s House Blend public service announcement: Judgment Day is just 100 days away! Recall that according to Mr. Harold Camping, gay pride and marriage equality are God’s promissory note for The Rapture. Payment in full expected on May 21st!
Speaking of payment, despite the imminent destruction of the Earth there’s still plenty of time to set up your recurring donation to Mr. Camping. Be sure to max out your monthly donation because heck, you’re not going to be here to get the bill. And surly Mr. Camping will cancel your recurring donation on May 22nd should he be wrong (again) about the date of the first Day of Judgment. Why, he’s so honest that I bet he’d reimburse all donations solicited on the misplaced promise of May 21st and leveraged with homophobic smears. Won’t you Mr. Camping?