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Michele Bachmann Doublebuttal Firehose Of Crazy Liveblog

(Michele Bachmann official photo)

(Michele Bachmann official photo)

And now, the moment I have been both anticipating and dreading: Michele Bachmann’s State Of The Union rebuttal… or possibly State Of The Union rebuttal rebuttal.  Because Tea is apparently A Party Unto Itself now, and Michele Bachmann is their leader.  Mainly by virtue of being the craziest of the crazy.

On the one hand, I’m hoping that Ms. Bachmann will grace us with some hilarious bon mots about the Founding Fathers’ courageous battle against slavery, while on the other I’m fearing that my feeble ears and fingers will be unable to keep up with the steady stream of batfuckery cascading from her Dubya-smooching lips.  So it’s probably a safe bet to assume that whatever unhinged ranting I manage to capture here, you should multiply it by at least three.  Wish me luck.

(rolls saving throw for sanity)

…Wolf Blitzer is already wetting his pants with excitement at the extraordinariness of it all.

…Piers Morgan thinks the Republicans should be worried about being split while Obama’s popularity is on the rise.

…Erick Erickson’s read her rerebuttal and thinks it’s even better than Paul Ryan’s, so that means it must be awesome!

…She’s not here to compete, the Tea Party asked her to be here.  The Tea Party is dynamic and awesome!

…Unemployment went up after the stimulus!  Failure failure failure!

…Sure, Bush’s deficits were bad, but Obama’s are even worse!

…Now she’s using charts to blame Obama for the jobs Dubya lost.

…Obamacare will force businesses to drop coverage, except for labor unions, which are apparently businesses somehow.

…Obama should propose a balanced budget amendment, increase energy extraction, eliminate regulations and health care reform.

…The real reason for our huge unemployment is our highest-in-the-world corporate tax rates.  Yeah, I’m sure that’s it.

…Man, it gives me the creeps whenever anyone says “American exceptionalism” likes it’s a good thing.  America is a miracle!  Maybe there’ll be another miracle!  Sure, maybe if we cut taxes enough, God will smile upon us with jobs and prosperity ponies!

…The slideshow behind her is a terrible idea.

…The “debt crisis” is just like WWII!  Liberty!  We the people!

…I have to agree with Erickson that Bachmann isn’t really contradicting Paul Ryan.  She’s just much much scarier.

…Insightful Candy Crowley is insightful: “I’m reminded… of what John Boehner said this morning, ‘It is what it is,’ and I think that’s about right.”

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