Late Night: Is That Mikementum in Your Pocket, Or Just a Soggy Burrito or Something?
I’ve been feeling pretty down about the political scene lately.
Not so much about intractable jobs crisis, the stupid wars, the corporate giveaways, the failure to get rid of blatant discrimination like Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, the inability to do anything about climate change, the assault on Social Security, the total absence of accountability for torture or economy-wrecking, the idea that unemployment insurance is a casino chip the ultra-rich can cash in for sweetheart tax deals — these are mild nuisances, at worst. Gnats! If that! Dust motes!
What actually has me grumpy is all the gosh darn partisanship in Washington. It is so unseemly, this bickering. So gauche.
Thank goodness for Michael Bloomberg! He delivered a Major Speech today, and it’s all wonderful stuff!*
I especially like the parts about it would be an Awful Tragedy for the Economy if the federal government were to regulate financial derivatives (!), or to fail to drastically slash business taxes, because, well, look how much Ireland seems to like its rock-bottom corporate tax rates (!!). **
Also you know he is forward-thinking because he uses Vivid Metaphors, such as encouraging us to “roll up our sleeves” because America is a “shining city on a hill.”
Such stirring rhetoric makes it quite clear that when he talks about Innovation, he isn’t just mouthing tired cliches that represent precisely the fossilized Free-Market fetishizing that has left us so royally fucked. No!
He is being bold and exciting! Can’t you feel the love?
Can’t you feel… the Mikementum?
*(Actually the stuff about immigration seems vaguely OK. Has Malkin or one of her puppies pooped the carpet over it yet?)
**(Yeah, he really says that. Look it up, I dare you.)