Bristol Palin Canardly Keep Up With The Disses

Like her mother, SnowSnooki Jr. does not take kindly to people saying not-nice things about her and, like her mother, her natural response is to go to ShoutyFacebook and get her bitch on in the loving embrace of her highly regulated GED-minions.

First it was Keith Olbermann for making fun of her “Greaseball-tard Attempts Pick-Up of Fat Girl ” dating tip video (seen above) to which Bristol’s Facebook Boswell lovingly tossed together this side salad of verbal roughage:

Accusing me of hypocrisy is by now, an old canard. What Mr. Olbermann lacks in originality he makes up for with insincere incredulity.

Which is the “yo-mama” of the snow set.

Then Margaret Cho said that Bristol had to go on DWTS to make up for costing her mother a chance to be Queen of America  (right after she killed a surprisingly acquiescent John McCain… even it took six or seven shots). Bristol’s automated retort mechanism responded with some kind of late-nineties lesbian codespeak that I am not familiar with despite multiple viewings  of Bound:

…but I say, if you understood that commonsense conservative values supports the right of individuals like you, like all of us, to live our lives with less government interference and more independence, you would embrace us faster than KD Lang at an Indigo Girls concert.

Okay. Still not getting it.

Now… today… at this moment,  Bristol Palin is very mad at Kathy Griffin (possibly because Griffin dated Bristol’s baby daddy after he sampled the goods and found them wanting and, besides, Bristol should be mad at Griffin since everyone knows that ex-boyfriends are just off limits… I mean that’s just like the rules of feminism)  but mainly Bristol was mad at Griffin for calling her  “fat”:

Bristol Palin is fuming after Kathy Griffin made fun of her appearance while hosting VH1 “Divas Salute the Troops” on Friday.

Clad in a bikini, the 50-year-old comedienne joked that the “Dancing With the Stars alum “is “the only contestant in the history of the show to actually gain weight” — but Griffin’s jibes elicited booing instead of laughter.

“Come on, come on. She gained like 30 pounds a week,” Griffin shouted over the crowd. “I swear to God, it was fantastic. She’s like the white ‘Precious.’ “

Oh, snap.

Instead of devising a lengthy comeback — as she did on Saturday afterMargaret Cho accused her mother, Sarah Palin, of forcing her to join ‘DWTS’ — the teen mom kept her rebuttal short and sweet.

“The audience’s reaction to this ‘comedian’ spoke volumes, and the decent people I know would probably have booed her, too,” Palin, 20, told Fox News. “I hope people didn’t have to pay money to hear her negativity and criticisms.”

And that is so unfair of Griffin. Because as Bristol (somebody else) wrote in her (Bristol’s dictated more or less) response to Cho:

…I was ready to get out of my comfort zone and try something new and challenging. I thought dancing would also be a great way to exercise–and it was.

So that 15 pounds she admits she put on? Totally muscle. Unfortunately it all developed under her  factory-installed original chin.

I blame it on the tit-shimmys.

(Bonus) Our little Colby on Kathy Griffin:

Ms. Griffin has used the Palin clan for her “comedy” material before.

Colby Hall : “journalist“. I bet he use “air-quotes” on lots of “stuff” when he’s “talking”.

What a “douche”.

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....