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Katy Perry Wears Eye-Rapingly Ugly Dress for Elmo, Christian Wingnuts Whine

Crossposted on Musings From Hedon

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! You'll all be happy to know my breasts are mostly healed, though the scars will require some time to fade. Anyway, onto the ranting.

So Sesame Street decided not to air a skit on television wherein marginally bearable pop tart Katy Perry sings a PBS-ized kiddie version of Hot And Cold on a playdate with Elmo while wearing the buttfuck ugliest wedding dress I've ever seen outside of Mimi on Drew Carey.

The reason for this cancellation? Christian/Catholic parents groups who watched the advance preview on YouTube were outraged by Ms. Perry's ugly dress. Not because it was ugly but becausae they found it to be too racy for their poor impressionable children's eyes. Because an ugly dress will of course always make 4 year olds ask about hardcore sex.

This story was broken in the Wall Street Journal, but that's not where I discovered it. I learned of this mindfuckingly brainhurting idiocy through the Huffington Post's link to this whackadoodle Catholic blog. The ignorance in the comments is, while in no way surprising coming from these sorts, staggering in the level of willful miseducation about simple facts.

The first few comments were applauding the censorship, but then someone pointed out something truly evil about the woman interviewing Perry in this YouTube video.

That video was embedded on the blog entry, presumably in a futile effort to make Perry terrifying to Christians, when she already terrifies sane people everywhere.

But the true isidiousness railed against in the comments, is that the interviewer is…. *GASP!!!* wearing inverted cross earrings.

I'm in way too much pain to day to let sleeping braind lie, so I posted the following as a comment. I got a little ranty of course, as I am often wont to do, but hey, there is immense joy in teaching deeply religious people just how little they actually know about their faith.


Um….. you people are blitheringly brain-hurtingly misinformed. About a great many things. First of all, complaining about Katy Perry's ugly as all hell but hardly racy or revealing dress makes you look so prudish even the Pope would tell you to relax a bit.

Secondly, all of you twonks whining about the interviewer wearing inverted cross earrings? Guess what folks?


If any of you people had paid attention in Sunday school, you would probably realize that the inverted cross is actually the personal trademark of Saint Peter, the first Pope, and one of the most revered figures in Catholic lore. When Peter was martyred by crucifixion he was said to have requested to be crucified upside down because he didn't feel worthy of dying the same way as Jesus. As a result, many dyed-in-the-wool Catholics actually consider the inverted cross to be a more acceptable thing to attach to your tacky jewelry than a regular right-way-up one. By wearing an upside-down cross, Satanists are unwittingly showing humility and unworthiness before Christ. That makes about as much sense as a neo-Nazi sticking it to the Jews by swearing off pork for life.

This is the biggest problem with idiots like you whining and crying in Jesus' name about how awful this that or the other thing is; NONE OF YOU can apparently be bothered to actually READ and LEARN the actual historical and Biblical facts you use to justify ridiculously insane moral outrage.

For example, so many of you cling to the Leviticus quote, “If a man lies with a male as he lies with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them.” (Leviticus 20:13), to justify hating gay people. But there are two serious flaws in this logic. First of all, at the time the Bible was first translated into English, the words “lie” and “lay” were NOT interchangable. Lay meant only to lay down, lie meant ONLY to lie, to be dishonest. Lie did not come to have it's double-meaning until the Great Depression when street slang became the popular vernacular. This is not opinion or conjecture, it is proven historical fact. Therefore the quote is about dishonesty. Remembering that women were considered property and not people, the quote is basically the Bible version of “bros before hos”.

Second of all, and more important, while so many falsely adhere fervantly to this misinformed idea of what that Leviticus quote means, they completely ignore several others as if they don't exist. For example.

“For everyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him.” (Leviticus 20:9)

How many of you have murdered your children for telling you to buzz off when they hit their tennage rebellious phase? Show of hands? Anyone? Yeah that's what I thought.

“Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves. You may also buy some of the temporary residents living among you and members of their clans born in your country, and they will become your property.” (Leviticus  25:44-45)

That folks, is the exact quote white folks once used to insist slavery was a God-Given right that Lincoln had no business revoking. But none of you would DARE demand it be adhered to today. At least not publicly.

“Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard.” (Leviticus 19:27)

Any of you men out there beg God's forgiveness for daring to realize sideburns just do NOT look good?

“…and the swine, though it divides the hoof, having cloven hooves, yet does not chew the cud, is unclean to you.” (Leviticus 11:7)

How many of you had bacon this morning? Yep, you're going straight to hell heathen.

“…do not plant your field with two kinds of seed. Do not wear material woven of two kinds of material.” (Leviticus 19:19)

Check the labels on your clothing. Chances are you violated this Biblical law without even knowing.

Oh but wait, here's the best one. Any of you like eating shrimp or scallops? Lobster or crab on special occasions? Guess what folks, if gays are going to hell for being gay, you're going to hell for eating at Long John Silver's.

“But all in the seas or in the rivers that do not have fins and scales, all that move in the water or any living thing which is in the water, they are an abomination to you.” (Leviticus 11:10)

“They (shellfish) shall be an abomination to you; you shall not eat their flesh, but you shall regard their carcasses as an abomination.” (Leviticus 11:11)

“Whatever in the water does not have fins or scales; that shall be an abomination to you.” (Leviticus 11:12)

Katy Perry's dress is a non-issue to anyone mature and intelligent enough to realize kids are generally NOT idiots until you teach them to be. And all the complaints about the inverted cross earrings prove how painfully uneducated about your own bloody religion you folks are. Do yourselves a favor. Actually sit down and READ THE BIBLE. Not just selected passages, but the entire book, front to back, every page, every word. You might be terribly surprised by the reality of it. And if you pick and choose which rules you follow and which you ignore, you are a hypocrite, plain and simple.

So how about instead of whining about Katy Perry's ugly dress, go do something worthwhile, like volunteer at a soup kitchen.


And no my dear ones, I'm not naive enough to believe this lesson in actual fact will affect any of the idiots, nor that my comment will even last an hour at most before being deleted, but sometimes when I'm having really bad Fibromyalgia flareups and want to curl up sobbing, it's cathaqrtic and helps me cope with the pain to shake their trees a little. With apologies to Sir Peter Gabriel.

And it worked, I certainly do feel a little better knowing that once again, a fat hermaqphrodite Pagaen sex magick Shaman knows more about Christianity/Catholicism than the loud wannabe Christians/Catholics who bellow hate and ignorance making the REAL ones who live and let live, educate themselves, and accept me just fine as I am look bad by association.

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