Shadowproof

Goldman Sachs Furloughs Execs to Help Close New York State Deficit


Screenshot of satirical Goldman Sachs website

Screen capture of press release

Goldman Sachs grows a heart? The financial services giant, in a press release issued early today, announced that its executives will be furloughed once a week, with money saved to be donated to New York State to help close the state’s deficit.

Goldman’s charitable plan is a welcome relief to middle class state employees and union members, who make on average $40,000 a year, as it puts Governor Paterson’s plan to save just $250 million from furloughing workers off the table.  From Goldman’s release:

The Goldman Sachs Group, Inc. (NYSE: GS) today announced that as of May 26, 2010, the firm’s highest-paid executives will be furloughed one day per week. The money saved will be donated to the State of New York, to help close the state’s budget deficit.

“Our company must set an example for the financial industry as a whole, and this is just a start,” said Andrew Mammon, Director of Media Relations for The Goldman Sachs Group, Inc. “Last year profits on Wall Street hit a record high of $61 billion – nearly three times the previous record. If we donate 20% of that to New York State, it would cover the state’s entire $9 billion deficit. In fact, it would provide $3 billion more – a ‘bonus’ to fund improved education, transit and health care for all New York.”

Goldman Sachs announced the new executive furlough program in response to the rapid recovery of financial industry profits, made possible by billions of dollars in taxpayer-financed loans. “Financial industry firms are posting record-setting profits, while the rest of the country remains stuck in a deep recession,” said Mammon. “It’s time for Wall Street to reimburse Main Street. It will strengthen our economy at the base, and it’s the right thing to do.”

Indeed. Paterson’s misdirected plan unfairly targeted state employees and would cover just less than 3% of the state’s deficit. By contrast, Goldman’s executive furlough proposal will save the state billions of dollars while allowing hard working middle class citizens to continue working as normal.

The governor’s worker-furlough proposal would save at most $250 million, noted Mammon, while the state deficit stands at $9 billion. “In contrast, our financial executive furlough program would provide a real solution to the state’s fiscal problems – problems that began right here on Wall Street.”

“When we help New York preserve kindergarten and public colleges, community health centers and environmental protection, we will truly be doing God’s work,” said Mammon.

Amen, Goldman. Amen.

(Clearly a [brilliant] work of satire.)

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