Over on CNN, John King (who is David Gregory’s slightly smarter brother) is leaving his Sunday morning Important Talk Show thing that I have never watched to take a night job and so the big guys at CNN have decided to cut the show back from four hours to one, and then they figured “oh, what the fuck, we might just as well give it to a Candy Crowley now” because she probably only makes, like, a quarter of what John King pulls down on account of her lady parts and stuff.
Previously called State of the Union, Crowley’s new quartershow will be called Some People Are Saying the Darndest Things and Candy will have on many almost important for some unexplainable reason guests like Bill Kristol and Tony Blankley who say shit like “Well, some people say that Barack Obama is going to sell Scott Brown’s nubile daughters into white slavery.” and then another guest will say “No? For reals?” and then the first person will say “Well, that’s what some people are saying.” …..and then they’ll all do sake bombs. KAMPAI!
Later Howard Kurtz will ignore the whole thing in his Washington Post Media Notes column unless he can work a Tiger Woods penis joke into it. Then he’ll cash his CNN check and blow it on sake bombs.