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How To Be A National Security Expert

Photo by Roadsidepictures

Photo by Roadsidepictures

I love John Amato, but clearly he knows nothing about what makes someone strong on national security:

Here’s some typical Cokie Roberts trivial conventional wisdom that so infuriates the liberal blogosphere on NPR (h/t C&Ler Melissa):


ROBERTS: Well, it’s always politically difficult for Democrats when they are dealing with an issue like terrorism. It remained the Republican’s only winning issue through most of President Bush’s second term, and it’s a particular problem for a Democrat who hasn’t served in the military….

Here you have it. So sayeth Cokie, queen of the gasbags. All Democrats are weak, weak, weak on national security. It’s fine with Cokie and the Villagers that most of the Bush and Cheney team refused to serve in the military when they had the chance, but during the Bush years the Villagers never questioned Republicans over their military experience or commitment to national security. Yet, it’s just Jim Dandy to question a Dem’s military creds.

Sure, military service helps a little bit, but by itself it’s not nearly enough to make someone tough on terror – just ask John “OBL BFF” Kerry.  No, what really makes someone a Serious Qualified Expert on national security is a little voice in their head screaming “AAAAAHHHH!!! The scary brown people are coming to kill us we have to kill them first OMG OMG OMG!!!” 24 hours a day, and the ability to bedwet on command.

For whatever the Bush administration and most of the other Very Serious Republican National Security Experts may lack in military experience, they more than make up for in bloodthirst and paranoia.  And that’s why they’re still eating the Democrats’ lunch despite being wrong about virtually everything it’s humanly possible to be wrong about.

So what’s the solution?  Simple, really: If Obama can develop an appropriately irrational fear and hatred of Muslims, then no one will care that he’s never served in the military.  I suggest that he pretend that all Muslims are, alternately, health industry CEOs and progressive bloggers – that should make him a respected national security expert in no time.

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