I have become convinced that pretending homosexuality doesn’t exist is not an option. …It does exist.  Gay teachers work at each of the four Reformed schools and there are students with homosexual feelings.  We want these students have a good school experience, they are allowed to exist.

— Huib van Leeuwen, President of the Reformed Schools committee

When Christian conservatives say with regard to gays and lesbians that they “love the sinner but hate the sin”, what do they do to demonstrate that love?  In the United States, too often such “love” is translated into cruel efforts to try to negate or “cure” a person’s innate homosexuality, and punish gays with punitive laws and unrelenting vilification.

Some conservative Christians in the Netherlands have a better idea.  Late last year, a new 3-lesson curriculum called “Gay in the Class” was introduced in the country’s four Calvinist high schools.  The focus of the curriculum?  Acquaintance, understanding and respect.

This was a completely voluntary development and not government mandated.  It happened because gay Calvinists from the organization ContrariO took the initiative and contacted their old schools and started a dialogue with teachers and administrators about what it is like to be gay in a school that negates your very existence.  ContrariO collaborated with the school committee (“GRIP”), and together they developed the curriculum.  Here is how GRIP describes “Gay in the Class” (linked to from the Actueel item “Lesbrief Homo in de Klas”):

The curriculum consists of three lessons.

In the first lesson the students become acquainted with the phenomenon of homosexuality by way of a short film and other materials through which it becomes clear what it means for someone if he or she is confronted in their own life with a homosexual orientation.

In the second lesson this acquaintance becomes a lot more intensive through a guest lesson given by a member of ContrariO.  The intent is that he or she talks about their own development and high school years.  That really brings it home for the students and they start to understand that your world can be turned upside down by realizing you’re gay.

The third lesson is intended for further processing through the discussion of a number of scenarios.  Which situation can occur in your immediate circle (your brother who comes out of the closet, a lesbian girl in the family who starts living with her partner).

Bravo to the members of ContrariO for doing the hard work of reaching out to their old schools.  And bravo to the Christian school officials for listening without judgment and truly loving and respecting your gay students.  This is what Christianity looks like.

Below the fold are my translations of two articles about the new curriculum.  I never reproduce articles in full, but am with these translations because presumably few Blend readers will be able to read the Dutch originals.

H/T Annette !Translation note:  “Reformed” here means the Calvinistic Reformed Church (“Gereformeerde”), and a Reformed school is a school operated according to Reformed Church principles.  This should not be confused with “reform schools” for the correction of youthful miscreants.

This article is from the daily newspaper Trouw, or “Fidelity”, which is “rooted in the Christian tradition”.

Lessons about Gays in Reformed Classes Break Through the Silence

1 November 2009, by Somajeh Ghaeminia

Gays are taboo in the Reformed school.  The curriculum “Gay in the Classroom” must break through that.  The schools are enthusiastic, the parents still have to be convinced.

The word “gay” didn’t exist in the Reformed society.  Gay youth discount themselves, feel guilty, sinful and bad.  That is changing slowly now that the Reformed schools and ContrariO (the Reformed organization for gays and lesbians) want to break the silence.  The curriculum “Gay in the Class” must make homosexuality open to discussion for Christian teens.  The curriculum, consisting of three lessons, was put together by ContrariO and GRIP (curriculum committee for the Reformed secondary education) and will be presented today to Minister Plasterk.

The lessons deliberately ignore the question of whether gay relationships are permitted or not.  “ContrariO doesn’t make a pronouncement on that”, said president Robert Daverschot.  “Because there are so many different interpretations of the Bible about that.  We talk with the students about the three going options: you remain alone; you choose a relationship, love and faithfulness; or you are seeking.  Everyone must make such a big decision for themselves.”

Part of the curriculum is a guest lecture by a gay Reformed person.  Students asked Daverschot regularly during test lessons whether he has a boyfriend.  “I talk truthfully about my relationship, that it’s not just a frivolous thing, that it was a long process and that I have asked myself if this is good in relation to God.  Marriage is meant for man and woman.  But what if the one you love so much is of the same sex?  Must you remain alone the rest of your life?  How can that be?  I have the students think critically about that.”

“These encounters make a great impression on the young Christians”, says Huib van Leeuwen, president of GRIP.  “They often hold incorrect associations about homosexuality, using the word homo frequently in a thoughtless way without realizing how much impact that can have.  Through our lessons we hope they begin to think and speak in a more nuanced way.”

It appears that gay students are frequently picked on and don’t feel safe at school, according to previous investigations by school inspectors.  Van Leeuwen has become more aware of this since he received visits from old students who are gay and revealed their experiences to him. “I have become convinced that pretending homosexuality doesn’t exist is not an option.”

That gay youth are welcome at the Reformed school is a painful point for many parents.  A few will not allow their child to attend the controversial lessons.  “Parents are afraid that we’re opening the floodgates, that we make pronouncements about the ethical side of homosexuality.  That is not so.  We are just discussing homosexuality.  Parents can find that scary and confrontational, but it is not realistic to say that homosexuality isn’t with us.  It does exist.  Gay teachers work at each of the four Reformed schools and there are students with homosexual feelings.  We want these students have a good school experience, they are allowed to exist.

This article is from Nederlands Dagblad, or “Netherlands Daily”, a general Christian newspaper.

Gay in the Reformed Class

31 October 2009

by Aaldert van Soest

Robert Daverschot and Huib van Leeuwen.  Robert: “I’ve already given the first lessons, and the students were hanging on my every word.” | Photo Rein Geleijnse

The Reformed high schools are going to give all students three lessons about homosexuality.  In the curriculum that will be offered next Saturday to Minister of Education Plasterk, no judgment is made about gay relationships.  ‘Acquaintance and ‘respect’ will be the focus.  “This is not about what is or is not allowed, but about whether the gay person is or is not allowed to exist.

Two perspectives

Try to imagine for 2 days that from now on you’ll remain completely alone.  This is the task that Robert Daverschot gave to a 9th grade class at a Reformed school during a guest lesson about gays.  “You did see them look a little crestfallen”, said Daverschot who is president of Contrario, a Reformed association for gays and lesbians.  “My intention is that the students really try to put themselves in the situation of a Christian gay person.”

A guest lesson by a member of Contrario is part of the curriculum “Gays in the Class” which will be offered next Saturday to the minister of education, Ronald Plasterk.  The four Reformed high schools want to teach the lessons to all students.  The material has been developed by the

committee of representatives of the four schools (GRIP) and Contrario.  “By inviting a gay person to one of the three lessons we want to integrate theory, a philosophical consideration of homosexuality and the human aspect”, says Huib van Leeuwen, director of GRIP.

Has this teaching methodology been developed because the current government is pressuring schools to pay attention to homosexuality? Daverschot: “No, it arose through a collaboration between the schools and Christian gays.  A few years ago, after I came out, I went back to my old school the Gomarus College in Groningen.  Looking back at my high school years I felt that the atmosphere could have been better.  I asked an old teacher: “Are there gay students at this school?”  His answer, with a big wink: “No.”  This is what I was afraid of, and that is what got the ball rolling.  Other members of Contrario also told people at their old schools how they experienced their school years.  In that way we put a face to the problem and we started collaborating.”

How were those high school years?

Daverschot: “My own high school years were not so bad by comparison with the stories of other Christian gays.  But I did have to cope with teasing.  In that period you discover you are different.  For instance you prefer to stand with the girls rather than with the boys during the breaks.  At the time you are barely aware that your behavior and your sensitivity may be related to your nature.  But the group already detects it and calls “homo”.  It made me unsure of myself and did not contribute to a positive self-image.”

Van Leeuwen: “Students often don’t realize what they are saying.  Therefore we see it as our responsibility to explore this theme in the class.  It’s not that that never happened in the past, but it turns out to be an uncomfortable subject to talk about.  Talking with teens about sexuality is already difficult, homosexuality is an even more sensitive topic.”

In the curriculum, no viewpoint is taken about gay relationships.  Why not?

Van Leeuwen: “That ethical question has purposefully been left out of this curriculum.  In this stage, 9th grade, we find it especially important to create recognition, understanding and openness.  In the later grades then the ethical questions can be discussed.  The message of this curriculum is meet each other without immediately having an ill-considered judgment ready.”

Daverschot: “If you assume that in a class there will be one or two gays, it is very a-social to immediately start the ethical discussion.  Much more important is to create a safe atmosphere.  Such a student has already heard for a long time about what is allowed and not.  The broader context is what is crucial.  The student has to know that he is welcome.  And also that he is welcome before Jesus Christ.”



Has a theological or ethical self-examination taken place among the creators of the lessons? Van Leeuwen: “We have not done an extensive Bible study.  In the study group there were three representatives of the schools, and two from Contrario.  We got to know each other and very quickly there was a feeling of solidarity.  Of course the question arises: what do we think of gay relationships?  Each has his own opinion on that but we all agreed that this question should not be part of this curriculum.”

But isn’t that a solution of convenience?  In lesson 3 all of the options are reviewed.  Having a relationship, being open to a relationship and the choice to remain alone.  Students surely will ask what is or is not allowed?

Van Leeuwen: “Of course students will ask those questions.  A teacher has the freedom to give his opinion, but we assume that this will occur within the framework of the curriculum where respect is the central theme.  I too have an opinion about it.  A thread that runs all the way through the Bible is that marriage is something for a man and a woman.  But I hesitate to make strong pronouncements based on this.   Subtlety is what is important in this discussion.”

Daverschot: “It isn’t black and white.  That is why it is so good that this method brings a gay person into the classroom.  I have already given the first lessons, and the students truly hung on every word from beginning to end.  They did not ask immediately what was or was not allowed.  Suddenly a human being stands before them and then even with teens who otherwise have rather black and white opinions, they hesitate.”

Have certain standards been set for the guest teachers of Contrario?

Van Leeuwen: “Not in the sense that they are not allowed to be in a relationship.  The focus of the lesson is how they experienced their own high school years.  Beforehand the teacher and the guest teacher from Contrario are introduced.  Then it is discussed that students can ask very direct questions.  ‘Do you have a boyfriend?’  ‘Do you guys sometimes do it with each other?’  The guest teacher is allowed to hint at his peronal opinions, but the emphasis should not be on that.”

Daverschot: “They must be people who are well-balanced in their own personal development and who wish to project the vision of Contrario and GRIP.  Many people have the idea about Contrario that it is a pro-relationship club, but that is not true.  We do not make any pronouncements about gay relationships.  I have no problem is someone says that a gay relationship is sinful.  But that can never be an endpoint because that means that you have to go to work pastoring people who stay alone.  How do you as brothers and sisters treat each other?  In that area I hear little that is innovative.”

Some parents and other interested parties from the schools will be afraid that discussing homosexuality in this manner is a step in the direction of accepting gay relationships.

Daverschot: “The alternative is that you leave the situation as it is and thus avoid discussion and coming together.  The Christian gay person then emerges damaged.”

Van Leeuwen: “It would not surprise me if there are anxious reactions but that doesn’t do justice to the real situation.  It is not about what is or is not allowed but about whether the gay person is or is not allowed to exist.  It is not an option to be silent about that.”

The question is raised in the curriculum whether you can tell whether someone is gay.

Daverschot: “I have sometimes experienced that in educational work I’ve encountered people who said afterwords ‘Hey, you’re actually a very ordinary guy.’  Apparently there is an idea that gays always walk around in pink clothes and with a woman’s purse.  In addition, many people still associate gays with images of Gay Pride.”

Van Leeuwen: “With three members of the study group we educated a group of teachers who would be the first to work with this curriculum.  We started by saying that at least one of we three was gay, and let the group guess who.  Two people got quite a few votes, and one of them was not gay.  Afterwords you then see that people offer apologies to the person whom he incorrectly had seen as gay.”

In the curriculum, with regard to relationships, all options are mentioned without making a judgment about them.  Does that also have consequences for the hiring policy at Reformed schools?  Can you credibly teach that class if the same school does not accept teachers in gay relationships?

Van Leeuwen: “There has to be a connection of course between the content of the lessons and the hiring policy.  But this curriculum is a stage in the education process.  The ethical question returns in the higher grades even though I question whether in the religious classes in the higher grades an unambiguous opinion is projected.  The directors in Reformed education are thinking very carefully about the appointment policy in relation to homosexuality.  I do not think that we push them in a particular direction with this curriculum.  You can, for instance, also have the policy not to hire convinced evolutionists while in the classes you do give attention to evolutionary theory.  

Daverschot: “I’m not going to prescribe to the schools which hiring policy they should have.  I do know that as high school student I would have liked it if I had known a man or woman at school that I knew was gay.  Someone who could address the matter with integrity could have helped me at that time.  That wish still exists among gay students.