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Late Night: The Grifters II – It Takes One to Know One

the-grifters-poster Oh, Sarah. It’s no wonder you so dislike your daughter’s baby daddy — he reminds you of a younger you, back in the day when you were hopping from college to college, first honing the art of the grift.

Playgirl spokesman Daniel Nardicio has released a statement blaming Levi’s manager Tank Jones. “He did not give ‘full-frontal’ as his manager Tank Jones reported he would. We’re thrilled with the photos we got, and are confident people will love them. Although there may be glimpses, we did not get full on frontal nudity.”

So that cute-but-dumb “f**kin’ redneck” high school dropout from a backwater town in Alaska has managed to convince everyone in the universe that he was going to pose in flagrante for a third-rate smut rag, and everyone believed him, including the people who cut the checks at Playgirl, the entire entertainment media complex, and his mentor, the Alien Queen of the Grifters.

Asked by Oprah about Levi Johnston, Palin, R-Alaska, responded: “I don’t think a national television show is the place to discuss some of things he’d been doing and saying.”

She continued: “By the way, I don’t know if we call him Levi — I hear he goes by the name Ricky Hollywood now, so, if that’s the case, we don’t want to mess up this gig he’s got going…. Kind of this aspiring, aspiring porn — the things that he’s doing. It’s kind of heartbreaking.

Out come the long knives! I believe in grifter chess terminology, that feint is called “The Lateral Doublespeak Monte”, also known as “I’m Not Going to Let That Fucking Redneck Punk Steal My Thunder.” I swear, if I didn’t know any better, I’d almost believe that Levi is damned quick study. One thing is for certain: he’s got Palin’s number, and he’s not afraid to use it.

And that makes me smile.

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NYC-based aquatic feline that likes long walks on the beach, illuminating the hypocrisies of "family values" Republicans, and engaging in snarling snarkitude.