Man oh man, I do love me some Republicans In Disarray stories, and if anyone’s the go-to guy for ______s In Disarray stories, it’s Ad Nags:

A party that has over the years been the home of a series of optimistic figures in American politics — from Ronald Reagan to Jack Kemp… to (at times) George W. Bush — is increasingly coming across as downbeat or angry….


[T]he Republican Party in general — and leaders like Mr. Cheney in particular — are viewed unfavorably by a significant majority of Americans…. And it can become a spiral: going on the attack typically has the effect of making Americans sour on the attacker as well.

Professional Republican wanker and Lieutenant-Dan-for-President booster Nicolle Wallace agrees!

Wallace… said there’s only so much soul-searching the Republican party can do without the next great leader, someone like President Obama “who matches the moment and transcends the narrow debates about ideology” while moving the political discourse “away from the past.”

What party do they think they’re talking about?  If you take away backward-looking mean-spiritedness, the Republicans have nothing left.  You might as well ask the Green Party to give up environmentalism, or the Whigs to give up… whatever it was the Whigs did.

And how is the GOP’s shiny happy rebranding coming along?  Here’s ousted former Republican congresswoman Marilyn Musgrave, describing what her Votes Have Consequences group will do to the Democrats:

We will spread the truth about their destructive agendas, drag down their approval ratings, force them to publicly defend socialism, authoritarian gun-grabbing, gay marriage, infanticide and everything else they vote for in Washington, and ultimately, on November 2, 2010, we will take their jobs away from them.

She also helpfully explained that she got crushed last year because “the radical homosexual lobby, abortionists, gun-grabbers and all the rest of the extremists finally spent enough money, spread enough lies, and fooled enough voters to defeat me.”  Oh yeah, that’s just the kind of grace and sportsmanship the new GOP needs.

Then there’s the conservative bloggers up in arms over the NRSC backing moderate Charlie Crist for Mel Martinez’s Senate seat, and Liz Cheney explaining that her dad simply has to speak out against Obama because he is Endangering America and besides, Al Gore criticized Dubya from Day One (um, riiight).  And this was a pretty slow day.

Yes, I suppose it’s a positive step forward that some Republicans are starting to realize that decades of sneering, snarling and sucking have given them a wee image problem, but they can’t do anything about it because they can’t – or won’t – stop out-of-touch assholes like Rush, Cheney, Rove, Gingrich, and Palin from defining them.  The American people will continue to recoil, but the Republicans just can’t help themselves. 

Oh well.  At least they’ll always be welcome in Woodward, Oklahoma.  Probably.