16304813_5c27775ba0_m.thumbnail.jpgAccording to this week’s edition of the National Enquirer, after her election as Alaska’s governor, Sarah Palin admitted her husband Todd was arrested for a DUI in 1986. But  she neglected to mention that Todd’s brother James one-upped the First Dude’s youthful idiocy by drinking, driving, plowing into a pedestrian, then leaving the scene.

Granted, James Palin did pull the injured victim out from under his truck before peeling away. And he did return to the scene of the crime, which considering there were witnesses was the smartest thing he did that night. The victim, Lydia John, suffered numerous injuries, including a fractured pelvic bone, and James Palin was arrested at the scene.

James Palin’s passenger was another of Sarah’s brother-in-laws,  James McCann, then married to her sister Molly, she of Troopergate fame.  James Palin admitted to having four beers and a shot of tequila before getting behind the wheel of his truck. He was fined a total of $50 and was given a ten-day suspended sentence, plus another $50 suspended fine. No jail time! Party on!

And then there’s First Dude’s mom and stepdad: his mamma Blanche Kallstrom sued the U. S. Government in series of claims and counterclaims surrounding a case where she tragically, and mistakenly, served a child lye-based detergent thinking it was fruit juice. Blanche took her case all the way to the Alaska Supreme Court, which rejected it.

Her husband Bob sticks with small claims court: Since 1995 he has filed over 100 suits against customers he claims owe him money.

Wow. That’s some clan.

The McCain camp’s background check for VP seems to be pretty lax on all fronts from foreign affairs to family values.  But it’s very thorough on evangelical bona fides and oil.

Lisa Derrick

Lisa Derrick

Los Angeles native, attended UC Berkeley and Loyola Marymount University before punk rock and logophilia overtook her life. Worked as nightclub columnist, pop culture journalist and was a Hollywood housewife before writing for and editing Sacred History Magazine. Then she discovered the thrill of politics. She also appears frequently on the Dave Fanning Show, one of Ireland's most popular radio broadcasts.

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