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Leave John McCain’s Houses Alooooooooone!


Hey, ask any Republican: John McCain is just a good ol’ average Joe Six Pack. Ask the Assrocket dude:

I can relate, though. For example, if a reporter asked me how many ties I own, there’s no way I could answer. Just like McCain, I’d tell him he has to ask my wife. Likewise if someone wants to know how many Wii games my kids have.

Because, you know, most of us just change our houses like we change our ties. Toss around the domiciles like so many video-game cartridges.

The truth is that McCain isn’t out of touch with "ordinary people" because he’s rich, he’s out of touch with his own domestic arrangements because he cares little about material things, and for many years has devoted his extraordinary energies not to enjoying his wife’s money, but to serving the American people.

I’m sure this is true. In fact, mebbe we ought not to go so hard on McCain.

After all, he doesn’t own any of the houses. He never has owned any of the houses. His wife is the one with the money, she’s the one who owns everything. She is the business man in the family. She wears the pants in the McCain family.

John has never had to make business decisions, buy a house, know what gas costs, or really know anything about managing money; his wife takes care of all that for him. I’m sure that it’s tough to keep track of all those houses under those conditions.

Like I say, just an average Joe Six-Pack.

UPDATE: The media (experts in Joe Six-Packdom themselves) want you to leave him aloooooone, too. 

[H/t to bmaz.]

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David Neiwert

David Neiwert

David Neiwert is the managing editor of Firedoglake. He's a freelance journalist based in Seattle and the author/editor of the blog Orcinus. He also is the author of Strawberry Days: How Internment Destroyed a Japanese American Community (Palgrave/St. Martin's Press, June 2005), as well as Death on the Fourth of July: The Story of a Killing, a Trial, and Hate Crime in America (Palgrave/St. Martin's, 2004), and In God's Country: The Patriot Movement and the Pacific Northwest (1999, WSU Press). His reportage for on domestic terrorism won the National Press Club Award for Distinguished Online Journalism in 2000.