946329281_c4fc4665d9_m.jpg(pictured: Ronald Reagan’s boyhood home in Illinois, where he lived until he moved to Iowa, then California, and later, Washington D.C.)

Another completely nonsensical column from Nooner today, who invents another completely bogus notion of what "Americans want" in a President. You see, our presidents must embody some regional stereotype, and if they don’t, we can’t trust them.

OK, quick, close your eyes. Where is Barack Obama from?

Hawaii. Go on, Nooner.

Neither man has or gives a strong sense of place in the sense that American politicians almost always have, since Mr. Jefferson of Virginia, and Abe Lincoln of Illinois, and FDR of New York, and JFK of Massachusetts. Even Bill Clinton was from a town called Hope, in Arkansas, even if Hope was really Hot Springs. And in spite of his New England pedigree, George W. Bush was a Texan, as was, vividly, LBJ.

Except Abe Lincoln was born in Kentucky and moved to Indiana — and didn’t actually get to Illinois until he was 21. And yet I seriously doubt, back in the good ol’ days that Nooner loves so much, that dumbass columnists were writing shallow columns lamenting the fact one couldn’t tell where Abe was "from" by his accent or mannerisms.

And George W. Bush is (was?) as much a Texan as his carpetbagger daddy.

By the way, Nooner — where the hell was St. Ronnie "from"? Was it Illinois? Was it California? How would you really know? What about Ike? He was actually born in Texas, but then, he didn’t have a fake ranch and talk with a drawl, so that doesn’t count. Can’t trust him.

The lack of placeness with both candidates contributes to a sense of their disjointedness, their floatingness.

Floatingness?

Finally, to wrap things up, Nooner clumsily overlays her "placeness" thesis on her veep choices.

But part of me tugs for Tim Kaine of Virginia, because he has a wonderful American Man haircut, not the cut of the man in first but the guy in coach who may be the air marshal. He looks like he goes once every 10 days to Jimmy Hoffa’s barber and says, "Gimme a full Detroit."

Detroit: that’s a place.

Tim Kaine was born in Minneapolis, grew up in Kansas City, went to college in Missouri and ultimately wound up in Virginia.

I can’t believe the Journal pays for this shit.

Blue Texan

Blue Texan

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