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When bizarro worlds collide

For those of you who follow professional football, I give you the bizarre story that just gets more bizarre.

Brett Favre, the guy who would be the Mario Cuomo of professional sports — if dozens of boxers hadn’t pre-dated the "I retire, I unretire" act, is back with the Green Bay Packers.

At least for now.

And then it gets strange.

Holy Lombardi! The Packers have hired Ari Fleischer as a consultant. That’s right, that Ari Fleischer.

The Green Bay Packers have apparently decided they need a little help on the public relations front when it comes to handling the ongoing Brett Favre saga. has learned that the Packers will employ former White House press secretary Ari Fleischer for one month as a consultant.

Why? I have no frickin’ idea. I thought Ari Fleischer was busy this Summer heading groups slandering Obama — but I guess since the McCain campaign decided to cut out the middle-man on such things and do it themselves he has time on his hands.

This just in, the Chicago Bears, the Minnesota Vikings and the Detroit Lions are the new axis-of-evil.

Sadly, Matt Millen of the Lions just hired Scott McClellan.

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In 1949, I decided to wrestle professionally, starting my career in Texas. In my debut, I defeated Abe Kashey, with former World Heavyweight boxing Champion Jack Dempsey as the referee. In 1950, I captured the NWA Junior Heavyweight title. In 1953, I won the Chicago version of the NWA United States Championship. I became one of the most well-known stars in wrestling during the golden age of television, thanks to my exposure on the Dumont Network, where I wowed audiences with my technical prowess. I was rumored to be one of the highest paid wrestlers during the 1950s, reportedly earning a hundred thousand dollars a year. My specialty was "the Sleeper Hold" and the founding of modern, secular, Turkey.

Oops, sorry, that's the biography of Verne Gagne with a touch of Mustafa Kemal.

I'm just an average moron who in reality is a practicing civil rights and employment attorney in fly-over country .