CommunityFDL Main Blog

Monday Late Nite: Cuban Sandwich Crisis


From the files of More Stupid Shit About the Bush Administration You Just Can’t Make Up:

Appearing on National Public Radio’s light-hearted quiz show "Wait, Wait . . . Don’t Tell Me," which aired over the weekend, Perino got into the spirit of things and told a story about herself that she had previously shared only in private: During a White House briefing, a reporter referred to the Cuban Missile Crisis — and she didn’t know what it was.

"I was panicked a bit because I really don’t know about . . . the Cuban Missile Crisis," said Perino, who at 35 was born about a decade after the 1962 U.S.-Soviet nuclear showdown. "It had to do with Cuba and missiles, I’m pretty sure."

So she consulted her best source. "I came home and I asked my husband," she recalled. "I said, ‘Wasn’t that like the Bay of Pigs thing?’ And he said, ‘Oh, Dana.’ "

What exactly are the requirements for White House Press Secretary? I think the White House Press Corpse, once it’s finished sucking down those chili cocktail weenies, should pepper the briefings with history questions to keep the Press Secretary on her Manolo-ed toes.

Here are a few suggestions to get us started.

1. True or False: The Battle of the Bulge is a low-fat, low-carb diet plan.

2. True or False: Ben Bradlee had an illustrious career in publishing before he met Sally Quinn.

3. True or False: Josip Tito is one of the original Jackson 5.

4. True or False: Lorne Michaels was ultimately found guilty for the S&L scandal of the ’80s.

5. Who is G. Gordon Liddy:

(a) NASCAR driver
(b) Prime Minister of Andorra
(c) Foul-mouthed British chef
(d) All of the above.

6. True or False: You can find Kampuchea in the beverage aisle of your local health food store.

7. True or False: Henry Kissinger received a Nobel Prize for his plan to depose notorious totalitarian dictator, Salvador Dali.

8. Which movie dramatizes the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1962?

(a) Twelve Monkeys
(b) Seven Brides for Seven Brothers
(c) 9 1/2 Weeks
(d) all of the above.

9. Finish this quote: "That is one small step for a man . . . "

(a) "but made for a woman."
(b) "touched for the very first time."
(c) "Who’s with me? Let’s go!"
(d) "so easy, a caveman could do it."

10. True or False: "The Manchurian Candidate" was a documentary.

Feel free to add your own.

[photo credit: AP/Ron Edmonds] 

Previous post

The Linear Logic of J. Assrocket Squirrel Esq.

Next post

This and that



NYC-based aquatic feline that likes long walks on the beach, illuminating the hypocrisies of "family values" Republicans, and engaging in snarling snarkitude.