When we last left the Five Brothers Craig was talkin’ Mexican, reluctant AlbinoBen had disappeared, Tagg, (who always seems to be around his dad, smiling and doing that crazy eye thing) was missing, Matt was showing off pictures of his parents dancing (thereby losing the Baptist vote), and Josh’s wife was redecorating the MittMobile, making it the VomitVehicle.
Hey! Where the hell did everyone go?
Well, Matt uses Politico to keep track of how many times Democratic candidates mention his Dad at the debate and how, if it was a drinking game, Matt would be soooooo wasted, but he’s not because alcohol is a sin and people who drink, like George W. Bush and Ann Althouse are going to Hell. Or Orem. One of those.
Meanwhile Josh&Jen continue their whirlwind “99 Counties But A Bitch Ain’t One” tour of Iowa with stops by a sign, another sign, a county fair (where Josh&Jen bought the kids some fried sugar and then Jen threw up again), and a drugstore where Josh used Grace to break in to get Jen some Pepto.
As for the other boys, well it looks like Mitt had to let them go because they were dragging the campaign down and he needed to lighten up the load.
I had heard that Fred Thompson was going to pick one or two of them up on waivers but he didn’t have the money. The good news is that Mike Huckabee is holding auditions for a new campaign son since the old one isn’t working out.
‘Tagg Huckabee’. I like that. I think he’ll work out as long as he doesn’t dance because then he would be going to Hell. Or Arkansas. One of those.