I’m the party star, I’m popular
I’ve got my own car, I’m popular
I’ll never get caught, I’m popular

Enjoying this probably makes me a bad person. I don’t care.

Screaming and crying, Paris Hilton was escorted out of a courtroom and back to jail Friday after a judge ruled that she must serve out her entire 45-day sentence behind bars rather than in her Hollywood Hills home.

“It’s not right!” shouted the weeping Hilton, who violated her probation in a reckless driving case. “Mom!” she called out to her mother in the audience.

Hilton, who was brought to court in handcuffs in a sheriff’s car, came into the courtroom disheveled and weeping, hair askew, sans makeup, wearing a gray fuzzy sweatshirt over slacks.

She cried throughout the hearing, her body shook constantly and she dabbed at her eyes. Several times she turned to her parents, seated behind her in the courtroom, and mouthed, “I love you.”

As much as this is a lesson to Paris Hilton, it is also a lesson to her mother, Kathy Hilton (from the original sentencing):

After the general public had cleared the courtroom, Hilton began to tear up. Sheriffs brought her a box of Kleenex, and she held a wad of tissues to her face as she placed her head down.

Then, said Edwards, Hilton’s mother, Kathy Hilton, angrily burst from the courtroom seating area toward the attorneys’ table, saying loudly, “I can’t believe this, I can’t believe this.”

She went over to her daughter’s side, standing over her and putting her arm around Paris as others crowded around her.

Eventually, Paris stood and was hugged by her father, Rick Hilton, who said, “I can’t believe this, either.”

“I don’t know what happened,” said Paris. “I did what they said.”

Kathy Hilton, red in the face, then walked up to one of the prosecutors and screamed, “You’re pathetic.” She then asked sarcastically, “Can I have your autograph?”

The prosecutor to whom Hilton had delivered her outburst completely ignored her, said Edwards.

About half a dozen sheriffs’ deputies then approached Kathy Hilton, who screamed at them, “Don’t you touch me, don’t you touch me.”

As the family was about to exit the courtroom, said Edwards, Kathy Hilton declared for all to hear, “[The judge] made up his mind before he even came in today. If it were anyone else, this would’ve never had happened.”

She then exclaimed, “And after all the money we spent!”

TMZ is on this like Jonah on a Ding Dong.

(Added): John revisits the time line that put Paris in jail:

On Sept. 7, 2006 police arrested celebrity socialite Paris Hilton in Hollywood on suspicion of driving under the influence after she was spotted “driving erratically” while out to pick up a late-night burger.

Hilton was charged Sept. 26 with misdemeanor driving under the influence and on Jan. 9, 2007, her lawyers entered not guilty pleas on her behalf to a single count each of driving under the influence and driving with a blood-alcohol level of .08 or above.

Less than a week later, Hilton was pulled over again, this time by the California Highway Patrol. She was informed that her license was suspended in connection with the September DUI charge and she’d signed a document acknowledging she was not supposed to drive.

Hilton pleaded no contest Jan. 22 to a reduced charge of alcohol-related reckless driving. The pleas earned her three years of probation and a $1,500 fine. Hilton also was required by the courts to enroll in an alcohol education program.

A month later, Feb. 27, Hilton — still with a suspended license — was stopped by Los Angeles sheriff’s deputies for driving “a new Bentley” at 70 mph in a 35 mph zone “in darkness without her headlights on.” In her glove compartment was the document she’d signed Jan. 15, acknowledging she was not allowed to drive while her license was suspended.

I think it would be safe to say that she is in a sympathy free zone right now.

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....