Tomorrow night is the State of the Union address and, as is my custom, I will avoid it like Chippendales Presents: Jonah! (you had to click on it, didn’t you?). The way I look at it, why give up forty minutes of Korean game shows or Gay, Straight, or Taken? to watch a man mumble through someone else’s words, many of which are spelled out phonetically for him on the teleprompter (nu-cu-lar and Ah-mad-in-jah-blah-blah). No, I think I’ll pass.
But, just to let you know what is coming, keep this in mind:
After six years of striding onto the House floor like a conqueror, President Bush will arrive for Tuesday night’s State of the Union Speech deeply unpopular and politically crippled.
The most vivid symbol of the new order of things will be House Speaker Nancy Pelosi literally looking over his shoulder.
Which can only mean that the Heatherbitches of the media and the right will expend an extraordinary amount of time panning through every inch of video and every screenshot looking for something, anything, that Pelosi does (a raised eyebrow here, a brief pursing of the lips there, an enormous yawn and glance at her watch followed by rolling her eyes and making a jerk-off motion with her fist) to criticize her with, at last proving that the Pelosi Reign of Godless Socialism and Forced Abortions was the darkest period in our nation’s history. Or at least since those three days before we found Jennifer Wilbanks safe and sound.
Well, not so sound, but you get the idea.