Imagination Gap

“No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die.”

Is it just me or is everyone else as uninterested in the poisoned Russian spy guy as I am? It’s kind of like we expect spies or former spies to be poisoned or dumped into tanks churning with pirahna or for them to be cut in half by a laser in a secret underground lair. What we don’t expect is for CNN to be reporting on their condition from the hospital. A lingering death from poisoning is like being laid-off from your job and being given a week to clear out your desk. That’s not very spy-ish unless, for example, the Russians later used a suitcase bomb to make the hospital explode in an enormous fireball, but then they would have had to hire Michael Bay and he’s probably out of their price range.

Also disappointing was the fact that Litvinenko failed to develop any superpowers from his exposure to radioactive polonium-210, like the the ability to walk through walls or super stretchiness or finding out he could read people’s minds the way that Ann Althouse does. But no, he just laid there; he didn’t even bother to levitate off of the bed or use his heat vision to warm up his tea. Bo-ring.

I have to say that I’m very disappointed in the Russians and their evil-genius spymasters. They were much cooler during the cold war.

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....