No sex please, we’re mourning
Just a reminder that Monday is Patriot Day, a totally made-up holiday where the citizens of the United States are asked to lower the flag to half-mast and observe a moment of silence at 8:46 a.m. eastern daylight time.
Sleeping Americans on the west coast, where it will be 5:46 a.m., are requested to avoid snoring. In the event of unplanned “morning sex”, it should be sad and grim and silent, in the manner best described by sex therapists as “Republican sex”.
Your cooperation is appreciated.