This is the end. My only friend, the end

So how is it gonna end?
We set out to finish M. Night Shyamlan’s latest opus for dopuses and we got back some interesting scenarios including a replay of the surprise finish from The Crying Game (although LITW is a story that M. Night wrote for his young daughter and we’re guessing that we won’t find the a description of “narf schlong” anywhere in the script.) Actually most came up with the same idea (phrased differently) based on the fact that the narf is named Story which is the kind of no-duh obvious clue generally found in a $100 square on Jeopardy. But, let’s recap the story so far:

Cleveland Heep (Paul Giamatti) has been quietly trying to disappear among the burned-out lightbulbs and broken appliances of the Cove apartment complex. But on the night that irrevocably changes his life, Cleveland finds someone else hiding in the mundane routine of the modest building — a mysterious young woman named Story (Bryce Dallas Howard), who has been living in the passageways beneath the building’s swimming pool. Cleveland discovers that Story is actually a “narf” — a nymph-like character from an epic bedtime story who is being stalked by vicious creatures determined to prevent her from making the treacherous journey from our world back to hers. Story’s unique powers of perception reveal the fates of Cleveland’s fellow tenants, whose destinies are tied directly to her own, and they must work together to decipher a series of codes that will unlock the pathway to her freedom. But the window of opportunity for Story to return home is closing rapidly, and the tenants are putting their own lives at great risk to help her. Cleveland will have to face the demons that have followed him to the Cove — and the other tenants must seize the special powers that Story has brought out in them — if they hope to succeed in their daring and dangerous quest to save her world… and ours.

…and so to wrap it up we turn with this one from Lons at Crushed By Inertia because of its respect for cinematic history and because it contains your minimum daily requirement of snark:

Okay, so obviously, we know that M. Night will eventually get around to revealing that “it’s all a story,” possibly being read by Cleveland to a little girl or some crap like that. I’m thinking he might take the notion one step further this time, sensing that everyone’s catching on to his little tricks. Soooo….

We pull back to reveal Cleveland reading the entire film’s plot, as a bedtime story, to a little girl.


We pull back to reveal Peter Falk from “The Princess Bride,” reading the film’s plot as a bedtime story to Cleveland


We pull back to reveal M. Night Shyamalan reading the film’s plot as a bedtime story to Peter Falk


We pull back to reveal God reading the film’s plot to M. Night Shyamalan

Because, let’s face it…The guy’s divinely inspired.

Sounds plausible to me. Well, at least more plausible than Unbreakable.

Congratulations Lons. You the Shyamlan-man…

By the way, with our new improved comments, this might be a good time to share your favorite movie finishes (Yeah yeah…Casablanca yadda yadda yadda). Me? I go for the bittersweet ones; The Accidental Tourist, Lost in Translation, and my favorite, Resurrection (which you still can’t get on DVD)

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....