Mike Gallagher who is pretty damn proud to be “the 6th most listened-to radio talk show host in the country” (which gets him cuts in line at Hardees) is tired of all of those smarty-pants celebrities and college graduates who are messing up the graduations that he’s not invited to speak at (I hear the seventh most listened-to radio talk show host in the country is doing the Stanford gig. Don’t tell Mike.) Says Mike about Jodie Foster:
But if some America-hating, Bush-bashing, Al Gore-loving movie star takes to the stage to rail against anything conservative or Republican, I think Iâ€™m going to demand at least a partial refund of all that tuition money weâ€™ve spent on our sonâ€™s education.
Donâ€™t University of Pennsylvania officials take their studentsâ€™ graduation ceremony seriously? Do they really believe that the Penn Class of â€™06 cares about the rantings of a pampered movie star as the seniors prepare to send out resumesâ€™ and go out on job interviews?
Well? Do they!?
Iâ€™m told the students gave Foster a standing ovation.
Big deal. College kids would give a standing ovation to Bart Simpson if he spoke to a graduating class. But maybe a college or university would want to consider someone who could actually enlighten tomorrowâ€™s leaders, not browbeat them into liberal submission.
So the students at the institution where Mike pays good hard money to educate his son leave the school, not only as malleable as cookie-dough, but they cheer being browbeaten. I’d say that Mike should get back more than a partial refund and then he should enroll his son in a trade school because that Temple diploma isn’t worth crap. Maybe an internship at Hardees is in the cards.
Later, Mike says:
Donâ€™t misunderstand my opinion of Jodie Foster, the entertainer. Like a lot of people, I think sheâ€™s a great actress and I have enjoyed her films. But I also like Barbra Streisandâ€™s voice or Alec Baldwinâ€™s acting or even Al Frankenâ€™s â€œStuart Smalleyâ€ on Saturday Night Live. Who gives a ratâ€™s rear end what an entertainer thinks about important issues like the war or a nationâ€™s response to a hurricane? These arenâ€™t people who have been elected or even appointed to serious positions of authority or credibility. They are pampered, out of touch performers who use their fame and celebrity as a platform for their vicious, nasty opinions
Did I mention that Mike is a talk radio host who got his big break doing “Tiger Tailgate Show” on the Clemson Football Radio Network?
As for “vicious, nasty opinions”:
I have a suggestion for the University of Pennsylvania for next yearâ€™s commencement speaker. I hear Ronald McDonald is available. Heâ€™s ready to rise to the occasion and speak to the eager young students about the Ham Burglar and the secret sauce in a Big Mac. Heâ€™d make as much sense as Jodie Foster.
Oh, snap! Talk show host #5 better watch their ass. This guy is the total talk radio package: a face for radio and the rhetorical chops of a twelve year-old.