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'Primetime' report on teen girls and sex airs tonight

It comes on at 10PM, and it looks like it will be a real (and sad) eye opener on relations between these young women and young men. “Primetime” and Seventeen magazine, gathered girls for a sleepover to discuss sex — the parents also were in the mix, interviewed afterward, to see the responses by the daughters. (ABC)

According to an ABC News poll, about 90 percent of parents nationwide say they’ve spoken to their teens about sex. Only half of their teens agree. So whatever parents think is “the sex talk,” it doesn’t seem to register with their kids.

…The girls at the sleepover were divided as to whether oral sex qualified as “sex.” As one girl Natalie said: “We just consider it to be like another thing to prepare you for actual intercourse.” Most of the girls seemed to agree that if you had oral sex with a boy, you could still be a virgin.

The attitudes of the boys quoted below are completely divorced from any influence of the feminist movement, contrary to the bleating of religious right, which always claims the opposite to be true.

How girls feel about themselves plays a huge role in their decision to have sex. Girls with low self-esteem are three times more likely to do something sexual that they didn’t want to do, according to our ABC News poll.

While some boys are busy pushing girls to have sex, do they really like the ones who do? “Primetime” talked to some boys about it and brought the tape back to show the girls.

“And if the girl gets with all these guys. … If she had sex with everyone, [she’s] like a bike that gets a ride,” said one boy Johnny, with a laugh.

“No one wants to get with a girl like that,” said another boy.

And no girl wants to get called the name that goes along with it — a slut.

While boys who have sex with different girls are called “players,” it’s a very different world for the girls who do it. They are, as one girl said, “ruined.”

The sad truth is that this culture is still doing a sh*tty job of raising its boys if are still depersonalizing and objectifying the girls in their peer group like this, and it’s clear that parents have let down teen girls in terms of helping them develop the confidence in themselves to respect their bodies in the face of pressure to have sex before they are ready. If they aren’t getting the tools to deal with these social pressures and life choices at home, depending on where you live, these young folks aren’t getting it in school either.

You can read about the parents’ reactions to what they saw their daughters say here.

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding