CommunityPam's House Blend

Securing the homeland on a wing and a prayer

Do you f*cking believe this?! Bush has just created, by executive order, a Center for Faith-Based and Community Initiatives at the Department of Homeland Security.

Our Dear Leader has spoken:

The Center shall begin operations no later than 45 days from the date of this order…The purpose of the Center shall be to coordinate agency efforts to eliminate regulatory, contracting, and other programmatic obstacles to the participation of faith-based and other community organizations in the provision of social and community services.

Comandante Agi at The Defeatists couldn’t let this mind-blower go.

I hope the president nominates Talibangelist Pat Robertson to head this thing. He could protect the homeland by issuing fatwas against foreign leaders and asking God to send hurricanes to wipe out countries. They’d have to change the terror alert threat level chart to something more Biblically appropriate.

Faith-based cargo inspection: “Only God knows whether or not a suitcase nuke is one of those container ships, so let’s place our trust in Him. Faith-based border patrol: “We’ll let you in only if you pledge your devotion to Jesus!”. And the prison system? Well, brother Jeb already has that covered.

My question — how soon before some of the all-too-familiar black pastors step up to the trough with some proposals for Dear Leader so they can cash in on this tip?

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding