Please remember, when purchasing last minute Valentine’s Day presents, to insist that the Hallmark Store/Victoria’s Secret/Home Depot/Bondage’R Us employee wish you a Happy ST. Valentines day.
We wouldn’t want to give Bill O’Reilly anything else to bitch about.
And knowing how hard it is to come up with something to write in the card, here’s some help from Bill:
Stripping off her bathing-suit, she walked into the huge shower. She pulled the lime green curtain across the entrance and then set the water for a tepid 75-degrees. The spray felt great against her skin as she ducked her head underneath the nozzle. Closing her eyes she concentrated on the tingling sensation of water flowing against her body. Suddenly another sensation entered, Ashley felt two large hands wrap themselves around her breasts and hot breath on the back of her neck. She opened her eyes wide and giggled, “I thought you drowned out there snorkel man.”
Tommy O’Malley was naked and at attention. “Drowning is not an option”, he said, “unless of course you beg me to perform unnatural acts â€“ right here in this shower.”
You may, of course, want to substitute another pet nickname for “Snorkel Man”.
Unless that is your pet nickname….
Honestly. We don’t want to know.