CommunityPam's House Blend

Fags and dykes, come get your iTunes

Blender Paul of Paul’s Rants has been attempting to get his booty recruited by the National Guard, seeing as how desperate they are for fresh meat to serve the Chimpster’s War on TerrorTM. Paul even went to their latest carrot-dangling maneuver, the “three iTunes songs for your address promo.”

Paul hasn’t heard back from anyone. Hmmmm.

Last week I filled out a form which promised 3 free i-Tunes downloads in exchange for being willing to talk to a National Guard recruiter. I wanted to see, considering that I’m a 59 year old faggot, if they would give me the tunes and send someone to contact me.

Well they sent me the code to download the tunes. I’m still waiting to see a couple of big buffed up troops come knocking. They tend to pick the pretty ones as recruiters…

He even offers to buy lunch for the recruiting hunks…check out the rest.

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In related news, the Army is lowering the intelligence bar for recruits. I guess as long as you can hold a gun and walk at the same time, you’re in. You can be a dumb*ss and a substance abuser, but heaven help you if you are a fag or dyke that wants to sign on — you’ll be turned away. At this rate, I think the fall of DADT is only a matter of time.

Facing recruiting shortages brought on by the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, the Army has decided to accept a greater number of recruits who score near the bottom of military aptitude tests, the secretary of the Army said Monday.

Coming off a recruiting year in which the Army fell short of its goal of 80,000 active-duty soldiers, Army Secretary Francis J. Harvey announced that the Army would allow up to 4% of its recruiting class to be Category IV recruits — those who scored between the 16th and 30th percentile in the battery of aptitude tests that the Defense Department gives to all potential military personnel.

The Army until now allowed no more than 2% of its recruiting class to be from the Category IV level, fearing that letting too many low-achieving recruits into the Army might dilute the quality of the nation’s largest military branch.

Hat tip, Facing South.

Earlier related Blend posts:
* Army recruiters tell HS student to lie out of his *ss to get signed up
* LAN parties — the new recruiting tool for the Army

* Military recruiting: F*cked.

* Army to miss recruiting targets, sibling combat policy on the table

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding