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Here's one event I know you want to attend

Conservatives to Salute Senator Jesse Helms. Perhaps the ground will open up and swallow this motley crew.

On Tuesday September 20, 2005, national conservative leaders will gather to celebrate the publication of the newly released memoirs of Senator Jesse Helms, HERE’S WHERE I STAND, at the Marriott Crystal Gateway in Arlington, VA.

Surgically preserved Empty Wig Dole, and Senator for Sale Burr.

The dinner event will be hosted by U.S. Sen. Elizabeth Dole (R-N.C.) and U.S. Sen. Richard Burr (R-N.C.).

Novakula, Mother Schafly, embalmed Beverly LaHaye and Paul Weyrich will be paying tribute to the racist, senile Helms.

Speakers for the event will also include Bob Novak, Phyllis Schlafly, Beverly LaHaye, Paul Weyrich, David Keene, Ambassador Jeane Kirkpatrick, Rev. Jerry Falwell, and Reed Larson. Dr. James Dobson and Franklin Graham will offer video tributes in addition to other surprise guests. Many of the senator’s former and current staff will attend the event along with a host of national conservative leaders and activists.

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding