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Another pious penis falls off the wagon

Ah, yes. Another for the Conservative Values Monitor. An 83-year-old Kentucky pastor, David Seamands, couldn’t keep his pious pickle in his pants. He had to admit to repeatedly boinking a woman other than his wife while preaching to the flock about “the integrity and sanctity of marriage.” Even better, his longtime affair was with a woman in his church. Wingnut web rag AgapePress talks to another pastor that is worried about the obvious bad PR for the AmTaliban movement and its effect on those parishioners trying to stay on the straight and narrow. Duh.

Recently, Pastor David Seamands apologized to his former church in Wilmore, Kentucky, for what he termed “a breach of trust and moral failure.” The 83-year-old minister admitted to “abusing the trust” of his family and friends by engaging in sexual misconduct over “a number of years” with a member of Wilmore United Methodist Church, where he had been pastor from 1962 to 1984.

Seamands is a best-selling author of books on emotional healing, who was one of the pioneers of the field of Christian counseling and who served as a professor and dean at Asbury Theological Seminary in Kentucky until his retirement in 1992. According to, he and his wife Helen were leading figures in the Marriage Enrichment and Engaged Discovery movements and have counseled more than 2,200 couples during those weekend programs.

Pastor John Gillmartin of La Verne, California, has been following the Seamands case closely and has written about it in his personal weblog. He says he is troubled that the seminary professor has offered guidance to others and has written several books on the very issues to which he fell.

Gillmartin points out that the damage done in a case like this can be nearly impossible to measure. “For all we know at this particular point,” he says, “there are young people out there or people in their middle ministry who are going through a crisis, and the news of this could be devastating to them and could cause them to lose their faith.”

I had to read this next paragraph twice, because I was crying from laughing after the first go-round; I’m sure Gillmartin didn’t intend the imagery…

Stud Seamands had plenty of holy horizontal action.

The focus has got to be vertical and not horizontal,” Gillmartin asserts. “I think too many of our people have wonderful ministries, but their focus is too horizontal — it’s too much to the world and not toward God,” he says, “and that can really weaken a man or a woman, and put you in a vulnerable position.”

Seamands, ironically, is also an “expert” at Christian counseling site DivorceCare. I wonder if he needs to use some of its services.

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding