National Day of Talking Back
to the Voices In Our Heads

Start by praying for a better eye lift next time Posted by Hello

Who knew that Mrs. Shirley Dobson, wife of James “Smack My Dachshund Up” Dobson was the National Day of Prayer Chairman? Oh. You hadn’t heard? Today was our National Day of Prayer when we have one of those little talks with the imaginary deity of our choice and ask him/her/them/it/Siegfreid & Roy to throw a little love the way of the “nation, governmental leaders, media, and schools.”

Need a little help? Of course you do. Here’s some handy hints from S-Dob:

Through this prayer guide, you will have an opportunity to petition God on behalf of our leaders and those who are in authority over us, as we are instructed to do in 1 Timothy 2:1-2: As you humbly come before the Lord and seek His face, please pray that these men and women will be granted divine wisdom, guidance and strength to fulfill their important roles.(My emphasis)

President: George W. Bush
Vice President: Dick Cheney
Secretary of State: Condoleezza Rice
Secretary of Defense: Donald Rumsfeld
Secretary of the Treasury: John Snow
Attorney General: Alberto Gonzales
National Security Advisor: Stephen J. Hadley
Director of National Intelligence: John Negroponte
Secretary of the Interior: Gale Norton
Secretary of Agriculture: Mike Johanns
Secretary of Commerce: Carlos Gutierrez
Secretary of Labor: Elaine Chao
Secretary of Transportation: Norman Mineta
Secretary of Energy: Samuel W. Bodman
Secretary of Education: Margaret Spellings
Secretary of Veterans Affairs: Jim Nicholson
Secretary of Health & Human Services: Michael O Leavitt
Secretary of Housing & Urban Development: Alphonso Jackson
Secretary of Homeland Security: Michael Chertoff
All Branches of the Armed Forces
U.S. Supreme Court

To save some time you can skip over praying to God for Justice Antonin Scalia because God already answers to Fat Tony.

And let’s not forget the Freedom Five:

Freedom Five is an initiative that challenges you to commit to prayer for our country on a daily basis. It involves praying for five minutes a day about five centers of power. By targeting these specific areas, America can experience the freedom that accompanies God’s power.

Pray that the Lord would grant wisdom, discernment and boldness to those who serve in authority over us, from city council members to the President. Also lift up appointed officials such as judges, cabinet members and agency heads, as well as the men and women in our military.

Pray for journalists to be fair and accurate and for entertainers to conduct themselves in a responsible manner.

Pray that your schools will get “back to basics” when it comes to educating our children, instilling the leaders of tomorrow with a respect for the Judeo-Christian values upon which our nation was founded.

Pray for your churches and their leaders while asking God to grant us the wisdom and vision to make the church a vessel for healing and revival in America.

Pray daily, not only for the institution of the family as a whole, but for individual families within your circle of influence that may be struggling.

And remember: if you have a family member who is still struggling that obviously means that you haven’t whupped the living tar out of them and driven them into a state of learned helplessness. It’s about time that they learned to respect your authoritah

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....