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Mary, Mary, quite contrary

Mary Matalin sucks up to the Cheneys by landing Gay Hypocriteâ„? Mary a book deal. Wonder if Cheney’s partner Heather Poe will get swept under the rug in Mary’s account of Campaign 2004?

The Sludge Report has info on what is destined to be one of the great white-wash books of all time — Mary Cheney is going to do her tell-all about working for her dad Darth in last year’s campaign. She’s certainly got a lot of explaining, er, spinning to do.

The curious and bold first acquisition of former Cheney adviser Mary Matalin in her new position at publisher SIMON & SCHUSTER is valued in the mid-six figures, top sources reveal. A top executive at VIACOM, parent of SIMON & SCHUSTER, who asked not to be named, was initally alarmed the deal would be seen as a “Thank You” from Matalin to the Cheneys.

“It’s so not the case,” said a SIMON & SCHUSTER insider. “This was a great opportunity to secure a great political story. Period.”

Mary Cheney, who during the 2000 and 2004 presidential campaigns served as a top aide to her father, will write from her unique perspective as both a campaign senior staffer and as a daughter. Her book will offer a behind-the-scenes look at the high intensity world of political campaigns. It will also offer her account of what it was like to become an issue in the 2004 presidential election.

…Matalin, editor in chief, said about her inaugural acquisition: “Mary Cheney was smack-dab in the middle of every major event at the highest level on the last two national campaigns.”

Perhaps she will give us the back story about what happened at the GOP convention, when Dick concluded his speech and was joined on stage by his wife Lynne, his straight daughter, Elizabeth (along with her husband, and their children) — and Mary and Heather were hidden away on another side of the arena far away from the action, as if they had the plague. Oh, that’s right, the GAY plague.

I’d like to see her comment on her mom’s unhinged and breathless “cheap and tawdry political trick” remark after John Kerry mentioned Mary in one of the presidential debates. She can address the notion that the “GOP outrage” following Kerry’s comment was orchestrated by Gay Hypocriteâ„? Mary herself.

Or maybe she’ll fill us in on what it felt like to be called “a selfish hedonist” by fellow Republican Alan Keyes.

It would be interesting for Mary to give her perspective on it’s like to be “out” as a professional queer for Coors, traveling the country, trying to persuade owners of gay bars to sell the company’s beer, and then later having to re-closet herself for her bigoted party. What was it like, Mary, to sell your soul to the American Taliban?

For extra fun, check out Mary Cheney’s formerly invisible partner Heather Poe in a series of AP/Reuters photos with captions at the blog The Pryhills.

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding