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Freepers are all for the sanctity of marriage, but guys, protect your wallet from the b*tch

Oh, this just too rich. Marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a woman. It’s so precious, fragile, and beautiful that it has to be protected from the homos, who will destroy the institution, along with the family, the country…oh, and of course the children.

The divorce rate is 50%, so heterosexuals aren’t doing too well at the institution, but the Freepers, in their perpetual state of transparent ignorance, show their true colors in responding to an article in the satirical Hoosier Gazette entitled, “More engaged men are setting up divorce nest eggs.” First snippets from the article:

The high percentage of marriages that end in divorce has created a new trend; many men are planning financially for their divorce before they even get married.

A recent survey conducted by the Indiana Marriage Research Institute (IMRI) found that 79% of men who are engaged to be married worry that their marriage will end in divorce and they will be ruined financially. As a result, more than half of these men admitted to setting up secret nest eggs in case their fears become reality.

“Some people believe this is the height of pessimism, but to me it makes perfect sense,” says Dr. Phillip Haus, director of the study, “Many of these men are professionals who have worked hard for their success and don’t want to start from scratch if the woman they marry turns out to be a total witch to live with.” Haus says the most common way engaged men plan for the worst is by setting up a savings account in the name of a relative they trust who has had a long, sound marriage so their funds will be safe. This way once the joint assets are divided after a divorce, they will have a little something extra to fall back on.

“Let’s face it,” added Haus, “The man is the one who almost always get screwed over when a divorce occurs. Even though he usually made more money than the woman in the marriage, he loses the house, and ends up paying child support since the woman will get custody of their offspring. This new trend just provides him with a little insurance so he can enjoy a decent standard of living.”

OK. Before we get to the demented Freepi, who clearly took this article seriously (check out the site — the front page features a headline for ” THG team training for the 2006 rope skipping world championships”).

Anyway, so what about facts, like those little details matter in Freeperland. They have their own sense of reality about live, love and trust in the sacred institution of marriage. And it all gets exposed like a horse’s ass. One Freeper actually tells them it’s satire, but they’re on a misogynist roll and cannot help themselves.

Actual Freeper Quotes™

“A better way is to create a separate IRA or 401K account, contribute to it while single, then stop contributing completely before being married… then it will grow and it is never commingled into the assets.”

“I can understand getting a prenup or postnup. It’s like fire insurance…you hope to never need it, but it’s there if you do. And it’s done with the knowledge and consent of both parties.”

“Sounds pretty good to me. Instead of all of those self-help books and marriage counseling, there should be some classes on how men can keep some their money.”

For those who don’t know, the “Hoosier Gazette” is kind of a local version of “The Onion”. Not quite as funny for non-Hoosiers who don’t always get the in-State jokes.”

“Been married 42 years, Long enough to know the basic principals of marriage are love and trust. How can anyone trust a person who has secretly salted away funds for a divorce. My advice is if you dont trust the woman you are marrying , dont marry her.”

Never , ever let a good piece of tail enter your thoughts of marriage. too many men think with the little head. Marriage is a lot more than sex.”

“It’s understandable but I suspect it will become a self fulfilling prophecy. It’s not the proper attitude to have when embarking on a marriage. It’s too bad that energy isn’t directed into making sure this is the right female and making it work.”

“Advice that would destroy the divorce industry if followed. As we speak, a league of domestic attorneys and state child welfare workers are being dispatched to track you down and bring you into compliance.”

The divorce system is NOT a pain from the female side – it’s filled with incentives. The only way this could be a deterrent is to get rid of the “no-fault” divorce. Let the person who strays, leaves, or creates a hostile environment for the spouse pay. The way it is now, women more than likely get custody (and therefore child support, whether or not it goes toward the child’s benefit), a LOT of property (usually including the house, especially when there are children), plus alimony (whenever they can). That’s quite a benefit package for the unfaithful woman.”

“I realize most states require that insurance policies cover only fortuitious events, but I wonder how long before it comes to “divorce insurance.” In fact, I wonder if Rush Limbaugh has such coverage….though he is a very high risk…..

“You’re right. Having a secret stash of cash is very different than pre-nups. Keeping secrets (other than “well…yeah, maybe your butt does look a little fat in those jeans”) is no way to make a relationship work.”

“The article doesn’t reference men on a second trip around the park. They may well have life experience that compels them to hedge their bets before getting back on the ride.”

“I do agree though that some of these measures seem so cynical that the guys taking those precautions should probably not get married, but not for their sakes….they’d be doing the woman a favor by stepping down.”

“The divorce rate is approaching 50%, with most divorces initiated by women. The overwhelming majority of these men trusted the girl when they married her. Several of them were friends of mine who got raped in the divorce. No matter how much you trust a person NOW, and no matter how trustworthy a person is this week, people change. There is no guarantee that the woman you love and trust this week will not turn into a 14-ct b***h in 10 years.”

“Heck, these men aren’t getting good advice. They should be advised to setup offshore foundations. In those foundations they can place their house, cars, bank accounts, clothes, etc., and nobody will be able to touch it or claim it but the individual. In these offshore foundations, the person can leave a last will and testament and/or instructions dictating to whom and how his possessions should be distributed should he become incapacitated (mentally) or die. Also, their names do not appear in any public document; therefore, nothing can be traced to the “owner.””

“I’ve never been married, but I can’t even fathom women trying to destroy someone they claimed to love at one time. If I ever get married I would work hard to make it succeed, but if it did end in divorce, I would expect to leave only with what belongs to me.”

“And I bet that if your future husband knew you wanted to be able to screw him royally in the event of a divorce, he’d be livid too.”

“Yes, the woman makes out like a bandit. Typically in her mid-thirties with a couple of kids — now there’s the kind of hot prospect guys are looking to date/marry.”

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Pam Spaulding

Pam Spaulding