He’s a rebel ‘cos he never ever does – what he should

I live in Dallas, Texas. I’m a 21-year-old junior at Northwood University as an Automotive Marketing/Management Major. I currently work full-time at a local car dealership in addition to school. I also play drums in a band and at my church as part of their worship team. My friends would describe me as a great friend, good listener, polite, sweet, caring, gentlemanly, intelligent, and passionate. […] I am a strong Christian, a pastor’s kid who never had the “rebellious stage” of a PK’s stereotypical life. I hold strong, conservative beliefs in both religion and life. I am a thoughtful, introspective person. Posted by Hello

Just like white is the new black, so it seems that “Josh” above (courtesy of Hannidate&#153: “Where chronic masturbators meet but don’t necessarily shake hands“) is still the new “rebel” and he may not even know it unless he reads Doug Giles who was such a rebel that he once hid his dope in his Z28 (you may now make that impressed “ooooo” sound):

Yeah, I’ve got to confess, rebels and rebellion were my mainstay growing up. In the movies it was the attitude laden dudes like James Dean, Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, Steve McQueen, Humphrey Bogart, Robert Redford and Paul Newman. I always seem to gravitate towards characters that are always bucking the system, doing the opposite of what everyone else was doing, or offending someone who had it coming to them.

And we just thought he was going through a latency period. Goes to show you…

When culture begins to spawn mindless conformity and cattle-like compliance to authority structures . . . when, via the media, we are sold thoughts we do not wish to buy, and when students are force fed agendas and propaganda in the classroom, then revolt becomes most necessary.

The rebel’s job is to fight against mindlessly accepted norms and exactly what those norms are fluctuate from decade to decade—just like Oprah’s dress size. But one thing is for certain, the dissenter will always rise up against the tyrannical tide of public opinion.

And if you’re tired of “mindless conformity and cattle-like compliance to authority structures” then Doug has just the “take-no-prisoners” kind of “posse” you’ve been yearning for. They’re called “Christians” and you better jump back Jack or they’ll pop a cap in your as–, well actually, they’ll just ask you if you’ll listen to them testify about Jesus which will make you want to pop a cap in your own ass just to make it all go away:

The big question is: What would a young rebel look like today? What would the new millennium’s James Dean war against and stand for? Well, if you’re talking about the young person who is unfortunately stuck in the public school system or in one of the multitudinous left leaning college classrooms, he would be bristling against the uncut atheism, secular liberalism and moral relativism that these places of propaganda ram rod down the throats of the masses 24/7.

In addition, if you’re talking about fording the prevailing streams of postmodern media, then that too would entail going against atheism, nihilism, secular liberalism and hedonism.

Because even though the nihilistic secular liberals who are having all the really really good hedonism look like they’re rebels: they’re not. (By the way, when we read about “uncut atheism” being ram rodded “down the throats of the masses 24/7”, we wonder if this is some kind of code that Doug is writing so Jeff Gannon will, you know, call him and they can go hunting or wrestling or something. Just wondering.)

Therefore, the ideological make-up of the 21st century young rebel in the classroom, who would be conducting the sit-ins, organizing the fasts and the peaceful protests, who would be fighting against convention and the cogs of the system, would be a young person who:

1. is pro-traditional family,
2. is pro-abstinence ‘til married,
3. is pro-heterosexuality and who thinks it is okay to not think it’s okay to be gay,
4. is opposed to anti-intellectualism,
5. doesn’t get so fat that he could hide small toys between his blubber,
6. is for protecting the life of the unborn,
7. owns a gun, loves to shoot and hunts animals,
8. is pro-God, goes to worship service every week and studies the Bible no matter what his “friends” say,
9. believes that faith has a space in the market place,
1o. supports the War on Terror,
11. thinks that Iraq and Afghanistan are better off than ever before,
12. thinks America is a fundamentally good nation,
13. believes moral relativism is an immoral croc which has gotten us into societal deep weeds.
14. doesn’t do drugs or abuse alcohol but rather gets high on life.

Young person: if this is what you believe and live, and if you dare to speak and defend this in the classroom and if you have the nerve to bring this up while at a party, then you, my friend, are A REBEL.

And remember, hypothetical young person who is an all-caps REBEL, the real rebels get all the hot chicks….and their cats named after the children they never had.

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