But I’m still available for bar mitzvahs and the occasional military blowjob

Has anyone ever been so outed as Jeff Gannon?

And now he is taking his balls and going home.

Jeff Gannon
A Voice of the New Media

The voice goes silent.

Because of the attention being paid to me I find it is no longer possible to effectively be a reporter for Talon News. In consideration of the welfare of me and my family I have decided to return to private life.

Thank you to all those who supported me.

Ah. The New Media…we hardly knew ye…

(“…me and my family…”? He must have missed the grammar half-hour at Crazy Eddie’s Two-Day Journalism and Barber College)

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....