You and me have a disease,
You affect me, you infect me,
Iâ€™m afflicted, youâ€™re addicted
You know that you waste too much time on the Internet if you have time to check on Mickey Kaus. But there I was, actually reading his column, with it’s umpteenth reference to the Feiler Faster Thesis, when it occurred to me that Kaus himself is exhibiting a hitherto undiagnosed mania. Let’s call it Kaus Kerry Derangement™.
Victims of KKD™ are completely unable to consider any speeches, utterances, actions, stories about, or pictures of John Kerry without seeing them in terms of how they show that Kerry is ill-suited to be President of the United States. KKD™ is particularly pernicious in putative members of the Democratic Party or people who identify themselves as “progressive”, despite all evidence to the contrary (see Tottenology).
The only cure for KKD™ is for John Kerry to drop out of the race, thereby clearing a path for John Edwards.
Unfortunately, this may lead to an onset of KED™ which mimics many of the same symptoms of KKD™, in addition to causing the afflicted to constantly repeat, “As much as I like Edwards, he’s just not ready yet…”.
Although neither is considered contagious, doctors recommend ignoring those diagnosed as KKD™ and KED™ -positive with a knowing smirk.
(Since I quoted Bad Religion above, it’s only fair that I plug their next CD, The Empire Strikes First, due out 6/8. Something tells me that it’s not going to be too complementary to the current regime)