You and me have a disease,
You affect me, you infect me,
I’m afflicted, you’re addicted

You know that you waste too much time on the Internet if you have time to check on Mickey Kaus. But there I was, actually reading his column, with it’s umpteenth reference to the Feiler Faster Thesis, when it occurred to me that Kaus himself is exhibiting a hitherto undiagnosed mania. Let’s call it Kaus Kerry Derangement&#153.

Victims of KKD&#153 are completely unable to consider any speeches, utterances, actions, stories about, or pictures of John Kerry without seeing them in terms of how they show that Kerry is ill-suited to be President of the United States. KKD&#153 is particularly pernicious in putative members of the Democratic Party or people who identify themselves as “progressive”, despite all evidence to the contrary (see Tottenology).

The only cure for KKD&#153 is for John Kerry to drop out of the race, thereby clearing a path for John Edwards.

Unfortunately, this may lead to an onset of KED&#153 which mimics many of the same symptoms of KKD&#153, in addition to causing the afflicted to constantly repeat, “As much as I like Edwards, he’s just not ready yet…”.

Although neither is considered contagious, doctors recommend ignoring those diagnosed as KKD&#153 and KED&#153 -positive with a knowing smirk.

(Since I quoted Bad Religion above, it’s only fair that I plug their next CD, The Empire Strikes First, due out 6/8. Something tells me that it’s not going to be too complementary to the current regime)

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....