…and we laughed and laughed. Then we had pudding.

The ever delightful Peggy Noonan is in rare form today. First she makes a subtle pitch to write speeches for John Kerry:

Shake it up, make it new. Mr. Kerry needs a young speechwriter for whom it’s all still moving and big. Someone who’s excited to be there and who speaks the language of America as it is now, a language that is awake, concrete, sometimes awkward.

and then proving that nobody does “awkward” like Peggy, she writes:

People around a candidate are always beating what he’s going to say into smoothness, but it is that very smoothness–affordable health care for hardworking Americans–that makes us all want to tear our faces off and run from the room, though perhaps I understate.

“tear our faces off”…Okay.


The one thing cable TV can’t resist, and can’t ignore even if it comes from a Republican, is wit. Wit brightens their copy. They love humor and joy. They will use a pithy putdown over and over. That’s why Mr. Bush got so much mileage out of even a wan joke about Mr. Kerry having been in Washington long enough to take two sides on every issue.

Mr. President, keep it up but do it better.

Cable TV likes wit from a Republican because it’s unexpected and novel, much like an interesting Larry King interview. But isn’t waiting for “wit” from George W. Bush a lot like waiting for Condoleeza Rice to admit that she was wrong…about anything? America isn’t holding it’s collective breath, particularly based on this story:

The other day I was thinking of the White House Correspondents Association Dinner a couple of years ago at which Ozzy Osbourne was the big attraction. He stood up when the president entered the room and gestured to his own long hair. He yelled out something like, “You should grow your hair too.” Mr. Bush looked and laughed and shouted, “Second term, Ozzy!” That’s the spirit.

It was funny. Wound up all over the news.

I guess you had to be there…drinking heavily.

…and taking acid. Lots and lots of acid.

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Yeah. Like I would tell you....